Ireland and Lord of the Rings

Joanna talks about falling in love and waking up in a car full of onions. Katie, Joanna, and Maddie debate who they'd trust to bring the ring to Mordor and why it could never be Maddie.

Follow the show on Instagram @mywholepersonalitypod
Produced and edited by Joanna Clark
Theme music by Rebecca Jaffe
Podcast art by Michelle Hong (michelleyhong.com)

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

I just I also think I would trust Katie the most. Yeah. I feel like Maddie, you would quit and be like, they'll never know. They'll never know I'd get it to Mordor. I'd be like, it's fine. It's fine. You guys, it's literally not that big of a deal.

SPEAKER_03 0:18

I'm sure it's fine. Who do we think of the three of us will be most likely to keep the ring for themselves?

SPEAKER_02 0:25

Maddie! What truth is that? Do you disagree with that, Maddie?

SPEAKER_05 0:33

No. Because think of the power. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 0:39

Exactly. I like this one thing, so I made it my whole thing. Now no one wants to talk to me at parties. Please listen to my spiel, because I made it my whole deal. I made it my whole personality.

SPEAKER_02 0:59

Yeah. Hey everyone, welcome back to my whole personality. This episode is um one that no one has asked for, except for the two people that are on it. I talk about Lord of the Rings all the time, and I've put it in a few of my sets, like my stand-up sets, and a few uh TikTok and Instagram reels, and the feedback I get is basically to stop. But I'm so excited that I created this platform for myself to talk about Lord of the Rings as much as I want. So this episode is with my friends Katie and Maddie. And we talk about Ireland and then we talk about Lord of the Rings. And listening back, I was kind of worried that maybe we were a little too hard on Maddie. Um and I was editing it and I was like, oh man, maybe maybe we shouldn't have joked so hard on her. And then she texted me last night and said that she'd gotten a tattoo at a yard sale. So I think we were the appropriate amount of heart on her. So just keep that in mind when we say that we're like, I don't know if we'd want Maddie to take the ring to Mordor. Just know that she went to a yard sale and um got a tattoo. So, and not a not a not a temporary tattoo, like a full-blown tattoo. So just think about that. And uh, I hope you all enjoy this episode, and I'll see y'all next week. I'm so happy to have you all on the podcast. So, joining me today are two of my best friends. I feel like people hear me say all the time, Katie and Maddie, Katie and Maddie. These are my friends, Katie and Maddie.

SPEAKER_05 2:47

We're here.

SPEAKER_02 2:48

Thank you all for coming on.

SPEAKER_05 2:50

Thanks for having us. Um, I've been waiting for this debut for however long the podcast has been out.

SPEAKER_02 2:57

I know, I know. And we've you've you've sent over some topics that we could talk about that are quite dark. I have.

SPEAKER_05 3:04

And just today I was thinking of others.

SPEAKER_02 3:07

Okay. What horrible thing in the world happened today that you've decided to fixate on? Don't say it.

SPEAKER_05 3:16

Okay, well, I will say this, and I I will just say this. I was thinking about like the like origin of words, okay, and like the history of words. Okay, because we're talking about orcs, right? And I was like googling what the fuck an orc is, because I forgot, and then I stumbled down a rabbit hole of like like what an what that is, what it means.

SPEAKER_02 3:48

I do love entomology. Is that what that is?

SPEAKER_05 3:50

I don't know. I I almost said entomology as well, and I thought it had to do with bugs. I think that might be bugs, right?

SPEAKER_02 3:56

I think that is bugs. Wait, hold on. It doesn't matter, I don't know, but I took that class in college, the bugs went. Oh, you did? Yeah, I loved it. It was one of my favorite classes. I should have surprised me. I know. Would you did you get to like hang out with them? Bugs? We caught them.

SPEAKER_00 4:14

Oh.

SPEAKER_02 4:15

And none were taken in alive class. There were.

SPEAKER_03 4:22

Well, did you catch any interesting ones or were they all like basically? No, they were all like creepy crawler stupid things. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:28

Um, but okay, so your topic could be Latin words or words.

SPEAKER_05 4:33

Yeah, words. Linguistics. I did win spelling bee twice in my day.

SPEAKER_02 4:39

I was actually thinking that would be fun to do with friends to have like a spelling bee as like a fun like party game. I have fun. Listen, if there's nothing about me, I'm fucking okay.

SPEAKER_03 4:52

I'm fucking.

SPEAKER_02 4:53

I'm fucking.

SPEAKER_03 4:55

Joanna, should we do the thing where we say, like, I'm Katie, so people can know that this my voice is Yeah, good idea.

SPEAKER_02 5:02

Go for it.

SPEAKER_03 5:03

Well, this is Katie, so you guys can hear my voice, and and now this is Maddie, and this is my voice.

SPEAKER_02 5:10

Perfect. Thank you, Katie. Good call out. Okay, so I'll just go ahead and get into it because I know that it's later there and I want to be respectful of y'all's time. But I thought we knew that we were gonna talk about Lord of the Rings because it's just like really important to us. But then I was like, what could I do up front to kind of lead into that? That's also my personality. What better topic than Ireland? Since I made it my whole personality for a long time, and we also went together to Ireland. As you all know, and I talked about ad nauseum. I went to Ireland, I forget what year, 2017, 2016. Boy, did I make it my personality. And then we went a couple years ago for our girls' trip.

SPEAKER_03 5:49

That was pretty impressive that you went to Ireland by yourself as well.

SPEAKER_02 5:53

It's very out of character, yeah. But also not, because I think I I mean, I know I just said that we all went to Ireland by the time.

SPEAKER_03 6:00

Were you about to just say you prefer traveling alone?

SPEAKER_02 6:03

I do actually really like traveling alone. Julianna! No, but I had, but it was like a totally different trip than with you guys. Like they not, they're not the same. But I traveling alone, I was surprised at how much I loved it, but it is crazy that I did it because I like stayed in hostels the whole time.

SPEAKER_05 6:19

Yeah, you like stayed, didn't you stay in like a co-ed hostel room?

SPEAKER_02 6:23

Yeah, I fell in love with one of my bunk mates. Yes. And then I don't I can't remember if I told you all this. Like, obviously, I was obsessed with him. Like, we were like messaging back and forth for a long time, and then he sent me this text and he's like, Hey, this song reminds me of you. And it was um Kevin's Heart by J. Cole. Do you all know that song? No. Oh it's a song about a man who feels really bad because he's repeatedly cheating on his wife.

SPEAKER_03 6:51

So does he have a wife?

SPEAKER_02 6:52

He had a girlfriend, turns out. Hey, it reminds me of you.

SPEAKER_03 6:58

One time I um was hanging out with a guy who had a girlfriend and I didn't know, and then he posted Lips of an Angel by Hinder on his MySpace. So I knew it was about me. As the other woman.

SPEAKER_02 7:12

She had thin lips? Is that what you were gonna say? What? Wait, you knew it was about you because the other woman had thin lips? No, I mean lips of an angel. Do you know what that song is about? No, I don't know what that song is about.

SPEAKER_05 7:24

Do you know that song? No, it's really good to hear your voice saying my name.

SPEAKER_03 7:31

It sounds so sweet. Guys, it took less than five minutes for Maddie to break into song.

SPEAKER_02 7:38

We just wanted to like get some things going here, but we had so much fun in Ireland. What was your old favorite thing that happened on our trip to Ireland?

SPEAKER_05 7:45

Well, I have a couple favorite things, but the first thing that came to mind is watching you throw up, Joanna, watching you throw up in a clear bread bag in the backseat of our car.

SPEAKER_03 7:58

Suffocated.

SPEAKER_05 7:59

Yeah. It was a health hazard back there.

SPEAKER_03 8:02

I will say that night, like the night before that of the epic hangover, was like definitely my favorite night. Us hanging out in Dick Mac's pub and Dingle. Um, and thinking that we were just best friends with all those bartenders. And yeah, it was a great night.

SPEAKER_02 8:24

I'm trying to figure out how to work that story into stand-up, but like every time I try and tell it, it like I think people get really scared because it does sound scary. Where I'm like, and then I woke up and I was in some guy's car and he had onions all over the floor. And then I was sitting on a retaining wall throwing beer behind my head.

SPEAKER_05 8:43

That that's funny.

SPEAKER_02 8:45

That was one of my favorite moments. Yeah. Yeah. When for those who don't know, because the guy who ended up taking us home, he took us home because it was also his home. It turned out it was his family home. His mother owned the Airbnb that we were staying in. And so he like went to go get us some beers, and Katie and Maddie just like f fled. They like ran into little hidey holes in the house. And I just remember sitting on the retaining wall with him, and he handed me a beer. And in my mind, I was like, I'm so blackout, I should not drink this beer. So, but I don't want to be rude. So I took the beer by my mouth and threw my head back and poured the beer behind my head and was like, glue, gluck, gluck.

SPEAKER_04 9:26

You said no way.

SPEAKER_03 9:28

I probably did. I probably did. I mean, it probably he was completely sober because he drove us home. So yeah, I don't think that it was a fun night.

SPEAKER_02 9:40

I honestly haven't like drank the same since then. Like that I remember texting you guys being like, I don't think I'll ever get over this. I direct I sent all of those bartenders a message on Instagram that was like two paragraphs apologizing for my behavior.

SPEAKER_03 9:58

Did any of them respond? No.

SPEAKER_05 10:01

Did any of them even read it? Uh yeah. They did. You know what else was a fun time? Was doing basically half of the um oh the cliffs of mower hike by myself.

SPEAKER_02 10:20

Okay, well, I have actual I have major issues with that tour. Why are they we shouldn't have gone on it? It was so dangerous, you guys. Looking back at pictures, that we could have the cliffs could have crumbled. We should not have been that close to the edge.

SPEAKER_03 10:37

Well, yeah, it was very unsafe. But that's what made it great because we could be right on the edge and it was beautiful. Oh, we're lucky to all be here. I will say I'm not mad about the safety or lack thereof. I'm still mad about that family dragging that tiny dog. They had a chihuahua on a retractable leash on a five-mile hike.

SPEAKER_05 11:01

And I'm thinking they were wearing like flip-flops. It was it was beautiful, and it was also certainly unsafe. You know, as we're like talking about this, there was we did a lot of things that like kind of had some darkness to them, like burial mounds. I mean, I I guess you added them to the itinerary, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 11:24

I guess they were all my no, I added the burial mounds. So, and I tell people all the time, I'm like, we went to go see these like Neolithic burial mounds where it's like we're inhabited by a people who are not Indo-European, they're like from a totally different, you know, family of people, and they disappeared, and no one knows what happened to them, and no one can decipher their language that's like on the burial mounds. It's crazy. It's very crazy.

SPEAKER_05 11:59

That's so cool that we did that.

SPEAKER_02 12:01

That's so cool that we just learned that.

SPEAKER_05 12:04

That is super interesting, Katie.

SPEAKER_02 12:11

We're gonna get into Lord of the Rings because I do want to spend more time talking about that than Ireland, but I like that we got a little bit of Ireland off our chest because that was a super silly trip. Um, but my whole personality, and I talk about it a lot, people have told me to stop including it in my comedy stuff because it I guess people don't really like it. But one of those people was Maddie. Yeah, I was one of those people is here tonight, um, is Lord of the Rings. And I'm so happy to talk about this with you both because Katie, you and I share a lot of Lord of the Rings love, and Maddie hates that about us.

SPEAKER_05 12:50

Uh you know, I wouldn't say hate, I would just say um I feel disconnected, which was what led me to watch the movies because I wanted to see what all the fucking fuss was about. I'm so happy you did.

SPEAKER_03 13:06

I really hates being left out, so I do.

SPEAKER_02 13:09

Yeah. You you ran through the zoo one time just to be with.

SPEAKER_05 13:14

I ran a 5k race just to fit in.

SPEAKER_02 13:18

And then you wouldn't even let us stop and look at the animals. You were like, oh my god, do we have to read every sign? It's like you begged, you yelled at me to come to this. We our first fight. That was a tough fight. That was like when I truly thought like we didn't know how to communicate with each other because I didn't know that what really matters to you is um w being wanted. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 13:43

So I'm one of those people who I have I need all five love languages and in order to feel loved.

SPEAKER_02 13:51

And I just wasn't picking up on that yet. So yeah, Maddie, wait, so I'm glad that you liked Lord of the Rings. So what are your all's relationships with Lord of the Rings? Katie, like, how did you come to it? When did you come to it?

SPEAKER_03 14:02

So I I came to it when the when the first the fellowship movie came out, and I went and saw it in theaters multiple times. I loved it. I think I was only like 10 at the time. Um, but it had a big impact on me, and so then I saw all the movies in theaters. I will admit, even though Lord of the Rings is my whole personality, I have not read the books, but I love the movies a lot.

SPEAKER_05 14:33

Yeah, and I just first watched Lord of the Rings um last summer, and I never want to read the books. Um that does not that's not my type of literature. But I will say what I did appreciate about Lord of the Rings, I appreciated the like like actual intricate storytelling, I will say.

SPEAKER_03 15:00

I think it's one of those series that comes so close to being like fantasy cringe, but it doesn't, and I don't know how they manage to achieve that, but it's like they take themselves so seriously, but it's so good.

SPEAKER_02 15:19

But they also don't. I was like re-watching it and I kind of forgot how slapstick it is. Like there's a lot of slap, like Gimli is constantly just being like true, making jokes. Don't toss the dwarf! Like, yeah, it's just like the beard! Yeah, yeah, there's a lot, and I watch the extended versions, and so there's like a lot of stuff that I saw that I don't remember, but it was like very jokey, and I think the hobbits, I know we're not gonna talk about that, those, but those are way more like better not, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 15:49

No, yeah, I think that's why I didn't care for the Hobbit movies as much, is because they're very jokey in a way that's it's like cheesy.

SPEAKER_05 15:59

Wait, so Gimli is the little fat dwarf guy, right? Yeah, he's my favorite. I liked him because he is like he's like the most like gruff, and like he he doesn't seem to do anything like right, but like he always like works out, and that is I feel like who I would be on this fellowship journey or whatever it is.

SPEAKER_03 16:26

Sorry, walking alone the clips of Moor. Yeah, literally, because I was left in the fucking lurch. Because there's there's a scene at the very beginning of the two towers where Aragor and Legolas and Gimli are running after the orcs that have taken the hobbits, and he's like, three days and nights pursuit, no rest, no food. And he's like behind them. But I do wonder in my head, I'm like, how is he actually keeping up?

SPEAKER_02 16:54

I don't know. They I yeah, because he's his legs are so much shorter. He said, he said he's a sprinter, not I'm wasted a long distance.

SPEAKER_04 17:04

And also wasted a long distance.

SPEAKER_05 17:06

I am certainly no sprinter, no one would ever look at me and say, Well, that girl, she can sprint. But I would be that person. I would be left in the lurch because my little legs can't carry me that fast.

SPEAKER_02 17:20

Yeah, I did write that down um when I was picturing who was who. I wrote down that Maddie would be gimlies. A little bad dwarf guy. Well, I thought that I honestly I put myself for Gimli, but then I said Maddie has a little gimli because I feel like I said because I feel like he's impulsive and nobody takes him seriously. Like for me, that felt true to me, where he's like, Well, I'll destroy the ring, like just like through an accident without even asking questions. It's like, let me just get this off my desk. But then he also like didn't want to be there, but he like he was like, Well, I don't want to be left out, and that felt like you, Maddie. You know, yeah, yeah. I I get it. And Pippin Pippin did the same thing, so I was like going back and forth between those two. But I said, I think Katie's leg loss because she's a beautiful leader, but with a silly side. Oh, yeah, well, thank you. Um, or Gandalf.

SPEAKER_03 18:13

He's got some some j for what for which reason? For his beautiful leader.

SPEAKER_02 18:19

For his bang and bod. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 18:22

For my head of similar hair.

unknown 18:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 18:25

Joanna, I see Frodo for you. Not in a mean way.

SPEAKER_02 18:31

No, but I'm I know, but I'm like, there is like simply no way I would do what he did.

SPEAKER_03 18:37

But I think you could walk barefoot.

SPEAKER_02 18:39

Exactly.

SPEAKER_03 18:42

Exactly. Well, thank you for not making me Aragorn so I can don't have to bang myself. I appreciate it. Wait, bang myself. Bang. Bang. He bangs himself.

SPEAKER_02 19:01

No, Katie thinks he's hot. Oh, oh, okay. I was like, when did Aragorn have sex with himself on the show?

SPEAKER_05 19:10

I would watch it.

SPEAKER_02 19:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 19:13

So to prepare for this podcast, because I know so little, despite having watched all three of the movies, um, I made a note in my phone of things to remember. And one of them just says, Boromir is hot.

SPEAKER_02 19:30

Oh my god, Boromir is so hot. I I liked Boromir a lot. One of my favorite moments of his, um, first of all, the actor Sean Bean, I like very much identify with because he, when they were filming all those scenes on the mountains, he's afraid of helicopters, and so they all took a helicopter up to the top of the mountain to film that, and he was like, I won't do that, and neither would I. And so he had to set out two hours early and hike up the mountain in his Boromir outfit and then like meet them at the top to film.

SPEAKER_04 19:59

Sweaty in his Boromir outfit. Yeah, yeah. Why wouldn't he just change when you got up there? That's what I was thinking. You don't want to take a backpack.

unknown 20:13

But yeah.

SPEAKER_03 20:13

He said to carry a sword.

SPEAKER_02 20:15

I guess. Yeah, I wonder if Props took his sword, but um, isn't that crazy? But one of my favorite moments of his, and I think about this a lot, and I like kind of want to do a TikTok character on it, is in the first one in the fellowship when I think like Frodo drops the ring or something, and Boromir picks it up and he's like looking at it, and I think Aragorn's like, give it back, give it back to Frodo, like don't keep it, and Boromir like reluctantly gives it over, and they're like kind of mad at him, and he's like, I I wasn't actually interested. He's like, You guys can take the ring. I like literally don't care, but he's obviously pretty embarrassed because he does care.

SPEAKER_03 20:51

And then he like ruffles Frodo's hair in a exactly way, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:56

Oh my god, did you all know that Frodo is 57 years old? No, his character is 57 years old at the time of this.

SPEAKER_03 21:07

Wait, what how did that happen? Because I thought Bilbo lived a long time because he had the ring. I think Frodo didn't have the ring that long. I think hobbits have a different lifespan.

SPEAKER_02 21:17

Um Aragorn was 87.

SPEAKER_05 21:21

Yeah, I remember that part. Wow. Isn't that crazy? Can we also talk about the name Bilbo?

unknown 21:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 21:29

That that stuck with me has stuck with me. Like, why is that the name that you choose you chose? Well, he didn't choose it.

SPEAKER_03 21:39

His parents chose it.

SPEAKER_05 21:40

Well, whoever wrote the story. Oh. Why did they choose like of all the names? They couldn't just stop at Bill. I don't know. It's kind of fun.

SPEAKER_02 21:50

I love it. I was so obsessed with Lord of the Rings when it first came out. My dad took me and because he like loved the books, and so that was really, really big for us, and then I loved it so much that. Um for Christmas I asked for you know the necklace that Arwen gives Aragorn? Yeah. I got it from a catalog.

SPEAKER_03 22:09

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 22:10

Do you still have it? No. I know. But I asked for that for Christmas. Um, and I got it. And I remember I wore it to the Macroni Girl one time and the server complimented it.

SPEAKER_05 22:21

So high roller. Mm-hmm. And also, I like that you said you got it from a catalog. I did.

unknown 22:29

I know.

SPEAKER_02 22:30

That was before we ordered things on the internet. Do you remember what catalog? Gosh, no. I can't imagine it was something cool. Something mainstream.

unknown 22:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 22:43

Did you guys like so did you like Arwen, Joanna? I know you've talked about Liv Tyler recently on this very pod. And you did not mention Lord of the Rings, which was shocking.

SPEAKER_02 22:53

I know, I know. Um, they didn't really give her any character. I liked her, she had the same tuberculosis voice as Nicole Kidman in Moulin Rouge, and I liked that character choice. She's like really breathy, sure. She's mortal life.

SPEAKER_03 23:11

Yeah, they don't ever let her speak speak normally, do they?

SPEAKER_02 23:15

No, it's the whole time she has tuberculosis.

SPEAKER_05 23:17

Did you not like her? I just like I just like that it was Liv Tyler. Because all I could think of the whole time was the movie That Thing You Do. And have you ever seen the movie That Thing You Do?

SPEAKER_02 23:30

Yeah, I thought you were gonna say Armageddon.

SPEAKER_05 23:32

Well, yeah, but you know, dare to be different. Everyone thinks of Armageddon. Sure. But at the end of That Thing You Do when she's like her boyfriend, like chooses, I don't know, like his his music over her, or he cheats on her or something. She says, Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes shut so tight. And that was a canon event for me. Really?

SPEAKER_02 23:59

How many times have you said that to a guy?

SPEAKER_05 24:02

None. Because I've never had the chance.

SPEAKER_02 24:06

Oh, because you keep your eyes open every time you kiss.

SPEAKER_05 24:10

Because I exclusively kiss with my eyes open.

SPEAKER_03 24:14

Wide open, baby. Um, yeah, I didn't like Arwen because I'm a petty, jealous bitch, and she was with Aragorn. Oh, okay. And he would wow. I wanted him to be mine. So.

SPEAKER_02 24:27

You do love him. I forgot how much you love him.

SPEAKER_03 24:29

I do. I do, I really do. The Go Mortenson in general, too. Like Hidalgo loved it.

SPEAKER_02 24:36

I don't think I've seen any other of his work. I just like him in Lord of the Rings. Perfect, perfect casting. Like that first shot when we see him, when it's like they cut to him in the bar and he has that hood over his head and he's just like staring at Frodo. Ugh. Hot.

SPEAKER_03 24:52

It's good stuff.

SPEAKER_05 24:58

Okay, let's talk about Middle Earth.

SPEAKER_02 25:01

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 25:02

Where you would want to live.

SPEAKER_02 25:03

Oh, perfect.

SPEAKER_05 25:05

I would really I want to live in the ghost mountain. Where the the like what are they called? The men of the mountain. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 25:17

I want to live.

SPEAKER_02 25:19

Did you watch the extended version? Because there are a lot of there's like an out an avalanche of human skulls at one point. You're making it sound more appearing. You're right, never mind. I forgot who I was talking to.

SPEAKER_05 25:32

It looks so cool in there. It looks like a just a haunted house. But where would you like live?

SPEAKER_03 25:39

Because it's there's just skulls covering everything.

SPEAKER_05 25:42

I don't know. I'd make a skull house. Yeah. Like made make a little hut.

SPEAKER_02 25:47

Okay. No, that's cool. I'm like, I I I'm surprised, but I'm happy for you.

SPEAKER_03 25:56

Yeah, I'm glad you're excited.

SPEAKER_02 25:58

Yeah, it just looks cool.

SPEAKER_05 25:59

Or the mines. The mines are cool too. The mines were cool before they fell. Like before they fell into disarray.

SPEAKER_03 26:05

Disrepair. Oh, wait, no, but she likes the mines with all the the bones and stuff in there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 26:11

When you want to wake up, you want to stretch your feet out of bed, and you want to put them down on a cold set of bones. Yeah. Somebody had a crush on the dead king. Was that you, Maddie? It was me.

unknown 26:21

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 26:23

It was me. Okay. Now that you're What did you like about him specifically?

SPEAKER_04 26:28

His swagger.

SPEAKER_05 26:32

He really, he just really, you know. The whole thing. I like the man who knows what he wants. What does he want? He just wants someone uh isn't there like a like a promise that they he wants someone to uphold or something?

SPEAKER_02 26:46

Yeah, he wants to be released from his he wants to be released and fulfilled his oath so he can dissolve into nothing.

SPEAKER_03 26:53

Yeah, they they made an oath and didn't keep it, so they're cursed, and that's why they're still alive.

SPEAKER_05 26:57

Yeah, we love a man with integrity.

SPEAKER_03 27:00

Like, um, he's cursed because he didn't have integrity. And you also like that.

SPEAKER_02 27:08

Wait, wait, I'm so sorry. Hold on. I don't know why this is reminding me of it. Didn't you go on didn't you drive like an hour and a half to go on a date with a guy one time and he said that he was pissed you didn't shave?

SPEAKER_05 27:21

Yeah. He also didn't have a bank account.

unknown 27:26

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 27:28

Okay, so it's a different time. It's a different me. Katie, where would you live?

SPEAKER_03 27:34

I think, I mean, I think Eteras would be cool because as we all know, I'm a horse girl. Um, so I think I'd like Eteras, but also Lothlorian seems pretty dope. My questions are though, like once the elves move, go back to the Undying Lands, like what happens to all their real estate? Like Rivendell's pretty sweet. Lothlorian is nice. Can we like take over?

SPEAKER_02 28:00

Would you you could start a um reality show like flip it or flop it, Rivendell?

SPEAKER_03 28:08

I definitely thought you were gonna say like real housewives of Rivendell. Rivendell. But then it would just be me alone because all the elves left. It's just Katie drunk in the woods. What about you, Joanna? Where would you live?

SPEAKER_02 28:22

I know it sounds stupid and basic, but I think the Shire. I think the Shire because um nobody seems to work very hard. Um they just seem to read and laze about, and they s they do smoke a lot of weed there. Like in the extended version, Pippin and Mary are like constantly smoking, and Gandalf does too. Um I like that. I also did like this, I don't know what you said, Katie, but like Rohan, I do like a vast open plane. Um, and I really was into a Aomir.

SPEAKER_03 28:57

Oh yeah, I think I meant to say Rohan, but I said Ederas, which is the capital city of Rohan.

SPEAKER_02 29:03

She knows the cage, of course, she knows the capitals. Oops. Okay, here's a fun fact. You know the riders of Rohan, how they like circle in the in the two towers, how they circle the boys. Um, a lot of those riders were women that they put beards on and prosthetics because they were looking for like good horse riders in New Zealand to be extras and like the best horse riders, a lot of them were women. And so Wow. Yeah. That's cool. Mm-hmm. That's super interesting. That's the kind of stuff you'll learn when you stick with me. What's your favorite movie of the three?

SPEAKER_03 29:45

So I would have always said the fellowship for like the longest time, just because I like, I don't know, I like that it's a lot of like just meeting different people and seeing different places and like seeing the characters. And I didn't like the two towers because it was mostly the battle. But then when I re-watched them recently, there are some such good like quotes from the two towers.

SPEAKER_02 30:08

That one's my favorite.

SPEAKER_03 30:10

I'm starting to lean that way, but yeah, between those two. And then Returner to the King, I just that's the one that I've seen the fewest amount of times. Still great, but also Aragorn puts his hair in a half updo updo, and I don't care for that.

SPEAKER_02 30:24

Two Towers is my favorite too, because that's when we get our most time with Gollum, but it's when he's like silly Gollum. Yes. Speakle. When he's Smeagol. I loved Gollum when he's being like so hungry and so dramatic about it. He's like starving. And then obviously, the line that Katie, you said when you slipped into bed with me that one night when you stayed with me.

SPEAKER_04 30:45

Gives it to us ra. It's wriggling.

SPEAKER_03 30:49

Well, listeners should know that my Halloween costume from this past Halloween was I was a potato and my husband was Sam Wise Gamge. And so the whole night just was going, teeters? What's teachers precious? Boil them, mash them, stick them in a stew, potatoes. So we were doing that all night. I do like Gollum. I he's the best.

SPEAKER_02 31:17

He's a complicated character. I feel like he had the they were giving him in a redemption arc, and then Faramir and his boys fucked it.

SPEAKER_03 31:27

Pisses me off. Maddie, what's your favorite movie?

SPEAKER_02 31:38

Did you like any of them?

SPEAKER_05 31:41

Um I will I didn't dislike them, but I didn't f first of all, alright. I can't keep any of the characters straight.

SPEAKER_02 31:53

They're all named like the same thing.

SPEAKER_05 31:55

So yeah, that's it's hard for me to keep them straight, and because I watch them in close succession, they all are one big movie to me. Um, and two, let's remember that I was doing this just to fit in. Yeah. So they don't mean as much to me. They don't mean the same to me as they do to you.

SPEAKER_02 32:17

To just Twilight mean anything to you because you watched that to fit in as well.

SPEAKER_05 32:22

Um, no, it's the same guy.

SPEAKER_03 32:26

Ouch! I thought you did like them. It's I think Twilight is funnier. I hadn't realized, like, I guess how many times I've seen the movies and how important they are to me. Because the last time I just re-watched all three, I kept quoting the movie like right before the line would happen. I would say it, and my husband was going to kill me. Like he was I was ruining the experience for him, but I also didn't care because I was enjoying myself so much.

SPEAKER_02 32:55

Wait, was that Twilight or Lord of the Rings?

SPEAKER_03 32:58

Oh, Lord of the Rings. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 33:00

Because honestly, though, I feel like you did that with with Twilight when we were watching it on that in Ohio. I feel like both of us were kind of like we knew what they were gonna say next. And Maddie was like, Will you guys fucking quit? Ruining the magic. Guys, am I a movie ruiner? No, you're just really good with like lyrics and words. You know, every president in order.

SPEAKER_05 33:21

Yeah, that's a flex. I feel like you have a lot of people. I think I forgot those. I think I forgot them.

SPEAKER_02 33:26

Well, you told us the capital of Rohan a minute ago.

SPEAKER_03 33:30

And you reminded us about the Neolithic era. Right. I could be wrong, though. I said that really confidently, but that could have been wrong.

SPEAKER_02 33:39

Do you remember when that person, I don't know who it was in the lunchroom at Doug Anderson, told me, or then I repeated it to you guys, that I was confident that there was this guy who made a lot of money because he was the only doctor in the world who could perform cataract surgery on sea lions. And I somebody like I remember like saying that in the lunchroom and being like, no, like this is a true fact. I heard this story from someone, and then they were like, Can we Google it? Can we look it up? And I found no information on it. Somebody told me that, and I was like, that was my trivia fact for a long time. I don't remember that now.

SPEAKER_03 34:14

Okay, I mean, I think that's really important, and it's good to do that for the sea lion. Wait, so what's the trivia fact, though, that he was the highest paid surgeon in the world?

SPEAKER_02 34:24

I think I just brought it up a lot when I was talking to people about like careers, career, potential career paths you could take.

SPEAKER_05 34:33

When you were thinking of pivoting.

SPEAKER_02 34:35

Yeah. Yeah. Okay, what is your favorite moment of all the movies? I do like when that orc guy says, Meat's back on the menu, boy. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 34:54

Yeah, that was gonna be one of my favorite quotes, too. I love that one. Mine is Frodo waking up in Rivendell in Return of the King when he's in that bed in all white in his little nightgown, and he's like, Yeah, the slow-motion laughing parts of this are weird.

SPEAKER_04 35:13

Gandalf! Ganda.

SPEAKER_03 35:17

No, he when he sees Sam, he just starts like tearing up because that is his love. Do you think yeah?

SPEAKER_02 35:23

Do you I mean, what do you think about that?

SPEAKER_03 35:24

Are you okay with them being together that way? Yeah, but I mean, it's not what Sam wanted, you know. So Frodo had to let him go.

SPEAKER_02 35:32

I know in the extended version, they make that pretty clear. There's a line, it might even be in the real version, but Frodo says something like I can't ask you to live this dual life, so I'm gonna take myself out of the equation. I don't think that happened. I think I think and then I think Frodo said, I'll never forget our last night together. I I can't imagine I made that up, but I did just tell that story of how I made up something before. Okay, so what's your favorite moment then, Katie?

SPEAKER_03 36:10

I really do love like, yeah, when Gollum catches the rabbits and brings them, and he's like, they're young, they are tender, and then Sam cooks them and he gets all distraught. And he's I do, that's such a good moment.

SPEAKER_02 36:26

Who do you think from the fellowship we'd all be? We kind of already did that.

SPEAKER_03 36:29

Yeah, I think probably Legolas, but I also feel like Mary, I'm kind of similar to, you know, like I'm not like Pippin is very silly and charming, and Mary's kind of the more like serious one, but also they're like a good little duo. So I feel like, you know, maybe me and Joanna, like I'm Mary and Joe's Pippin. I could see that.

SPEAKER_02 36:54

Yeah. No, for sure. I just was thinking Maddie. Are you okay?

SPEAKER_05 37:01

Yeah, I'm I'm uh I'm breathing. I'm deep breathing over here. I'm actually trying to think of who I could be that would be the arch nemesis of you for that.

SPEAKER_03 37:11

You're like, if that's paper, who's scissors? You're the oracai that picks us up and carries us away.

SPEAKER_02 37:18

Who does say, I think he says meets back on the menu, boys. Okay, yeah. Um, yeah, who's your favorite orc leader? Who's your favorite orc uh orc leader? My favorite is the guy whose whole head looks like cauliflower ear.

SPEAKER_03 37:33

Yeah, I was thinking about him. I didn't that's why I don't like him.

SPEAKER_02 37:37

Oh. You don't like wrestlers?

SPEAKER_03 37:41

Excuse me.

SPEAKER_05 37:43

What's your beef with wrestlers, Katie?

SPEAKER_03 37:45

Wait, wait, maybe I like maybe I like the orc that's like, what about the legs? They don't need those. They don't need no legs. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 37:55

Why can't we have some meat? Katie, again, you have a photographic memory. Who which one of us would you trust to take the ring to Mordor? I'm going with Joanna.

SPEAKER_03 38:06

I said Katie. Wait, why did you say Joanna, Maddie?

SPEAKER_02 38:15

Why not me? Maddie, I literally said, Maddie and I have foot problems. I would quit. Maddie would draw too much attention to herself. I feel like you would like walk up to an inn and be like, so I'm carrying something very important. Do you have an upgrade for me?

SPEAKER_03 38:37

What kind of discount do you have? Well, Maddie would definitely buy shoes the day that she is leaving. Have to walk to Mordor. To walk to Mordor and then get horrible blisters. 100%. And then have to be carried. So which I guess Sam does carry Frodo at the end. So the tracks.

SPEAKER_05 39:00

Well. Okay. I just think Joanna can scramble up a mountain better than any of us. Excuse you. But yeah, you think Yes, you are sneaky athletic. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 39:15

That's so nice. I am scared of climbing though.

SPEAKER_05 39:19

I know, but if faced with the task, you could do it.

SPEAKER_02 39:24

You think I rise to a challenge?

SPEAKER_05 39:27

I think gun to your head.

SPEAKER_02 39:31

You get that rolling.

SPEAKER_05 39:33

I mean Katie's the most dependable of all of us.

SPEAKER_02 39:36

I think I think I just I also think I would trust Katie the most. Yeah. I feel like Maddie, you would quit and be like, they'll never know. They'll never know I'd get it to Mordor. I'd be like, it's fine. It's fine. You guys, it's literally not that big of a deal.

SPEAKER_03 39:58

I'm sure it's fine. Who do we think of the three of us will be most likely to keep the ring for themselves?

SPEAKER_02 40:05

Maddie! Within seconds, she'd pull that boromir. I didn't like I I literally didn't care, anyways.

SPEAKER_04 40:16

I don't want it.

SPEAKER_02 40:17

Do you disagree with that, Maddie?

SPEAKER_05 40:22

No. Because think of the power.

SPEAKER_02 40:27

Exactly. Exactly. Um, I'm just gonna go through some um some notes and some trivia real quick, okay? Sean Aston jumped on a piece of Sam jumped on a piece of glass while they were filming the end of the fellowship and he hit it to the hospital, it punctured his hobbit uh prosthetic foot. Oh no. Vigo Morenson, he bought the horse that he rode. He bought he bought his horse in Hidalgo, too. God, where does he keep all these horses? He also, the stunt woman, fell in love with her horse and he bought it for her. Oh, I did know that too. Yeah, pretty cool, huh?

SPEAKER_05 40:59

Where's he got all this horse money?

SPEAKER_02 41:01

Okay, here are just like some random notes. War used to be so weird. Like they would all meet up at the same place and then like decide to start at a certain time.

SPEAKER_05 41:11

Yeah, and they would just say, like, war.

SPEAKER_02 41:15

Yeah, and like everybody do your best to wear this color. Get as close as you can to the shade of this.

SPEAKER_05 41:23

Um they're like bridesmaids.

SPEAKER_02 41:25

Exactly. Another favorite part of the movie when Sauron Sa Sauron and Gandalf fight in the tower, and it just looks like they put a couple wigs on top of broomsticks and threw them around. Put them in a rock tumbler. Oh, oh my god, another great scene is the orc midwives, like how there are those like midwives that basically like pull the orcs out of the mucus. That's pretty crazy. The Udrukai. Um, all the men in this show have goatees, every single one of them. Um, there are no thin-lipped celebrity women anymore. Just in general. In general, because I was looking at Liv Tyler's mouth and I was like, you literally never see a woman in a movie that doesn't, that has like no one's got thin lips. But she doesn't have thin lips in the movie. No, I'm saying she has huge lips, and I thought this is why I could never be cast.

SPEAKER_03 42:13

Do you think well Eowyn kind of has thin lips? But that's why Air Gorner doesn't pick her, I guess.

SPEAKER_02 42:20

I guess, and I'll tell you what, compared to mine, those look like honkers. Boromir's dad's castle on the inside, it looked like a Sephora. Did you notice that? Elaborate. Uh, it just um do I have a video of it? I don't think so. But it was just like black and white columns, very clean. Oh. Oh, there were a lot of teen girls running around.

SPEAKER_03 42:43

I will say a follow-up. So, our the same Halloween that we dressed up as Sam and the potato, our friends dressed up as Denethor and a tomato.

SPEAKER_02 42:54

Only that changed the way that I eat tomatoes. Like, I'll I can't ever eat cherry tomatoes now because of him. Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_05 43:02

The last thing that I want to say is that why are we not well, two things. Why are we not talking about how Gandalf is literally, he literally gets resurrected. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 43:14

He's so annoying when he gets resurrected too.

SPEAKER_05 43:17

Yeah. I mean, I bet Jesus was annoying when he got resurrected too. Like, come on, guys. But yeah, I think that's crazy that he got resurrected and we don't talk about that enough. I also think.

SPEAKER_02 43:29

Are you gonna celebrate instead of Easter this year? Are you gonna celebrate Gandalf the white?

SPEAKER_05 43:36

Um, and then I wanted to also say, I looked up when I was look like looking up orcs and trying to decide like maybe which you know which one I liked the best, or you know. I read that Tolkien misused the word orc. He thought he he he used the word orc to like call orcs. They are because um there was this like merge of language in like the 11th century that the word orc actually refers to a kind of metal cup in old English, but in the 11th century, the entry of orc was conflated with another entry which refers to evil giants, and it's also glossed in Latin as orcus. So Tolkien, uh as well as other people, um were led to believe that orc was an actual old English word that refers to a kind of evil creature.

SPEAKER_02 44:39

Wow, isn't that interesting? So, really, he should have called them orcus?

SPEAKER_05 44:43

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 44:44

Oh, look at all these orcases.

SPEAKER_05 44:47

That's bad press for orca whales, I think.

SPEAKER_03 44:50

Um, well, thank you guys so much for doing this. It was our pleasure. Great. Yes, this was very fun.

SPEAKER_02 44:57

Thank you for having us. Thank you all, Maddie. You'll have to pick a we'll come back on from Obwives. That's right. Thanks for listening to My Whole Personality. This podcast is edited and produced by me, Joanna Clark. Theme music by Rebecca Jaffe. If you like this podcast, please like, subscribe, rate it, review it, wherever you listen to podcasts. Thanks for listening. Bye bye.