Bear Safety and Magic (NOT Sorcery)

Joanna explains why you should never give a bear a donut. Joanna, Kaitlyn, Hannah, and Meredith go to a magic show.

Follow the show on Instagram @mywholepersonalitypod
Produced and edited by Joanna Clark
Theme music by Rebecca Jaffe
Podcast art by Michelle Hong (michelleyhong.com)

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

I like this one thing, so I made it my whole thing. Now no one wants to talk to me at parties. Please listen to my spiel, cause I made it my whole deal. I made it my whole personality. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:20

Hey everyone, welcome back to my whole personality. This episode is kind of a strange one. Um I I actually recorded this um with my Twilight friends uh who have all been on the podcast. It's Hannah who did Typhoid Mary, um Caitlin, who did Mustard and Star Trek with Emily, and Meredith, who did The Beatles. We all went to a magic show and we recorded uh a little bit of an episode on the street before the show and then in a car after the show. So I'll be honest, the sound quality is terrible, but um we we were just having fun and I wanted to try something new. Um but before that, I am gonna talk a little bit about uh a trip that I just went on. I I didn't do an episode last week. I fully intended to. I had like put together all these clips from previous episodes, like early episodes that I thought would be fun to revisit because I was traveling and I thought I could release that while I was out of town, but then I just forgot. Um I forgot. So sorry. Uh hopefully we're back on the every other week schedule starting now. But yeah, I was in Canmore, Canada, with my family. We did kind of like a family reunion. Canmore is right outside of Banff. And if you don't know what that is, I didn't either. But it's like a really beautiful national park, um, mountains, tons of mountains. It's so beautiful. It's so beautiful. As soon as we landed and we're like driving towards the mountains, my mom just started talking about how she wanted her ashes there. Uh as soon as we saw the first mountain, oh my god, this is where I want my ashes. So she does that every time we see somewhere really beautiful. So um probably gonna need her to nail down the definitive answer on where she wants her ashes spread. Um, but it was it was beautiful. It was, we did like a lot of hiking with my family, and I'm not a hiker. Period. I don't, I can't remember the last time I I walked on something that wasn't a sidewalk, but I think hiking might be my new personality. I I loved it. Um, it was really hard, but um, I did this like crazy difficult hike with some of my cousins where it was like I think almost eight miles. Um we basically scrambled, it's called a scramble, but I was on my hands and knees crawling up like a pile of rocks and then walking across snow, and it was just, I mean, it was gorgeous, it was really hard. But we kept being warned about bears, and I feel like I spent probably 75% of the trip looking for bears and rehearsing what I would do if I saw a bear because there are a lot of bears where we were, and um, every time we would leave the hotel, they were like, Are you going on a hike? Here, you gotta take some bear spray. And that was kind of scary. But I was glad that they had it for us. And what's interesting is that bear spray is treated kind of like a registered firearm there. Like if you buy bear spray, it's like it's somehow tied to your name and you have to dispose of it properly. Because if someone, I guess, gets your bear spray and uses it inappropriately, it'll for some reason come back on you. So I was scared to buy it, which was nice because we could just then like check it out from the hotel. And so I always had some or had some in my little pocket. But um, they're serious about bear spray. There are a lot of signs that say, like, don't come into the store if you if you don't have the safety on your bear spray. Cause I think they have a lot of accidents. And then um turns out for a good reason, because my dad was accidentally bear sprayed. Um my sister and I were uh doing like a little hike with him, and we'd kind of stepped off to the side to take pictures of this lake, and then we turn around and we see my dad just coughing and spitting, and I guess some guy had um accidentally deployed his bear spray, and my dad was too close. And um, that was kind of a buzzkill. It was my dad was fine, but uh it took a while for him to kind of clear that out of his out of his system. I think it's essentially like really powerful pepper spray. So, and I learned a lot about how to use it. Like actually, while we were up there, right after my dad had been bear sprayed, this man just like came out of nowhere and started talking to me and my sister about bears. They love to talk about their bears in Canada, um, or wherever we were. But this guy came up and he was asking us if we'd seen any bears, and we were like, no. And he said, You know, I've been charged four times, and we were kind of like, oh, okay. Um, and then he just told us about him, how him and his roommate won't go camping a lot and they seek out bears. And he was telling us about how he likes to keep his bear spray clipped to his belt buckle because he likes to shoot from the hip. And I don't think this man is gonna live for much longer. He kept talking to us about all the times he'd been charged, uh, about how he was eating breakfast, and a grizzly bear kind of came at them while they were eating breakfast, and just telling us where we could go to see bears. And he walked away and I said, Jesse, I think we're probably, if not the last people to ever see that man alive, we're close. Um but yeah, people love their bears. Um, they love the bears there. We learned a lot. There are actually two bears there that are kind of celebrities. One of them is named the boss, he's a big grizzly bear. He is like famous on the mountain. And he is called the boss because he's pretty much responsible. I think that he has uh um fathered like an outrageous percentage of the grizzly bears that are in like Banff and the surrounding parks. He also has hit been hit by a train twice, and he's survived. Like this is crazy. He, I guess, like bears when they come out of hibernation, they like to go to the train tracks because like grain and stuff has maybe fallen off the trains. And so twice he's gone in down there to get a little snack and been hit by a train and then just walked away from that. But he has um competition. There's this other bear that we heard about called Split Lip. And Split Lip is a little bit younger than the boss, and Split Lip is coming for the boss's crown, and there are like videos of them fighting and kind of like encroaching on each other's territory. So yeah, people talk to us a lot about bears, and um, we also learned, oh, there's this bear. He, I don't know why I'm gonna start out this way, it's because I'm such a Debbie Downer. He's dead now. But um, he his name was Skokie, and he because like you see these signs everywhere that are like, don't feed the wildlife. If you feed the wildlife, it kills them. And I thought, all right, that's a little dramatic. It's like when you, it's like, I don't know, they always said that if you like gave rice to a pigeon, it would explode its stomach. Um and I thought, are they just being dramatic? But no, because when bears eat something like really good, like if you give a bear a donut or a croissant or something, they will keep coming back to that spot, and then like there's nothing you can do about it. And so they could potentially then attack someone and have to be killed. So what happened with Skokie is there was this grizzly bear who wandered into town, walked in the back door of a bakery, chased everyone out, ate a bunch of pastries, and then he was like, I'm so full, I'm gonna take a nap. So he walked out, saw a tent where people were camping, thought it was like a nice big um pillow, I guess they said. And so he collapsed onto the tent and fell asleep while the people were in there. I think they made it out okay. I don't know, somehow the rangers came and they tranked him. They shoot, they shot him with a tranquilizer gun and took him far away and dropped him like on the other side of the mountain because they're like, we don't want him coming back for these croissants. Unfortunately, he came back for those croissants because I think that's just what bears do, and I have so much respect for that. So he kept going to the bakery and they were like, oh my god, someone is bound to get killed if he keeps coming in for these pastries. So I think after a couple times that that had happened, where they he'd come to get the pastries, they had to tranquilize him, drop them on the other side of a mountain, they kept like putting him far away. He kept coming back. So eventually they decided that they had to put him in a zoo. And um, he lived in the zoo for many years, and he actually just died recently. But his pictures were so cute, and I just loved that story because I just I relate to him coming back to the same place for a little pastry and an app. What's not to like? Um, and then there was another sadder story about how someone gave a bear a donut and he kept coming back to the spot where the donut had been given to him, and uh it escalated and they had to kill him. So don't give bears donuts or don't give them anything. I actually read up a lot about on bear attacks, which I'm gonna share a little bit um in a minute. And I just I want to be clear, please don't you can't use this information, but maybe ask someone else for survival tips. But in a lot of the stuff I was reading, it's like if you have a backpack on full of food, you would think like, oh, if a bear is attacking me, kind of like if somebody somebody's coming to mug you, you like throw the purse in the other, you know, in one direction and you run the other direction. They're basically saying, don't do that. Like, don't ever give up your backpack, don't give up the food, because I guess you don't want to reward these bears for hunting people. Um but yeah, everybody kept telling us about bears, so I was like, I don't know what to do if I encounter a bear. So I did a little bit of research. And a lot of different um schools of thought here. For one, they say you want to make a lot of noise when you're hiking. No problem for me. No problem for me. So because of that, people will wear bells on their backpacks because they think that it'll like alert the bear to somebody in the area. But um, that's actually not something you should do because it's not quite loud enough. It's like kind of faint, so it makes the bears a little curious, so they'll come out and be like, what's that sound? And then, you know, they'll see you. So it's kind of like ringing a dinner bell. But what my sister told me is like, you know, there are two types of bears you can encounter in the mountains, unless you're dealing with a polar bear, in which case I can't help you. But um, you know, there's brown bears, which are grizzlies, and then there's black bears. And so if it's black, fight back, and if it's brown, lay down. So if it's a black bear, it any let me start over. In any bear situation, you don't want to run. Like the number one thing about encountering a bear is you're not supposed to run, which is um, I don't know that I have that much faith in myself to not uh to not run. I I can't even handle being just like kind of surprised by seeing somebody I wasn't expected in the hallway. I drop to my knees, I scream. So I this is gonna be really hard for me. But what you want to do, you don't want to run because that triggers their prey instinct. So then they'll start chasing you. So if you see a black bear, you want to get really big and loud and kind of like appear to be an alpha over them, which is such a bummer for me because I have never been an alpha in my life. Um, I don't think it'll start when I see a bear. But everyone, you know, they say like stay calm, talk to the bear, stand your ground, like just kind of be like wave your arms and be like, hey, bear, yeah. Don't do that. But just like be calm, be cool, talk in a low tone. I bet I I think maybe like gaslight the bear into thinking like you're cool, they're cool, everybody's cool. Again, this is not something, this is not something I have in my toolkit. So I think you do that for any color bear that you see. Um, so they say if it's black, fight back, if it's brown, lay down. Cause I think that black bears, I don't think that they want to eat people. I think that they just like to eat berries. Unless they're protecting their cubs. So I think, like, yeah, for sure, fight back. Um do your best, pick up a pick up a stick, get your bear spray, don't climb a tree because they're better at that than you. If it's a grizzly bear, you should not fight back a grizzly bear because I think that they like that. Those sick little fucks. They like when you fight back. So you're supposed to lie down and play dead. You're supposed to like lay down on your stomach with your backpack on your back, and it said spread your legs. I don't know. I don't know about that. Um, but I think it's so that it can't roll you over. Like you want to make sure that it doesn't roll you over onto your back and get access to your to your tummy and to your intestines. I don't know, I made that up, but that is, you are supposed to stay on your stomach as long as you can, and then hope that it gets bored with you. So I again, I don't know that I have that much faith in myself to play dead. Like I I think about this a lot, which I'm gonna talk about in I mean, spoiler alert, spoiler alert, spoiler alert for House of the Dragon. But I thought about that when Jace, like the actor who plays Jace, said he had to play dead for like 10 hours while they were filming Rhaenyra, you know, like filming them, moving his body through what looked to be like a crowd surfing situation, and then Rhenira crying over him. And I always think that would be so hard to be an actor and play dead. My gosh, what a good job he did. And um, so I think if we were to, he would probably do fine in a bear attack. Um, I don't think I would. I think I would, I'd be so scared I would sneeze. I sneezed while I was brushing my teeth the other day, and it went so crazy. I literally ran out of the bathroom and saw Heather and I was like, Did you see that? It I've never so much force has never come out of my mouth before. Like sneeze, also sneezing while driving, so scary. Um snee sneezing while getting attacked by a grizzly bear or playing a corpse on TV, new things to be scared of. Okay, also if a bear, if you want to get away from a bear, you like you don't run away. You're supposed to move slowly sideways. Like you don't want to turn your back to it, you don't want to go at it. Um, so yeah, you just kind of want to grape vine on out of there. Um, and also with the bear spray, I think you're supposed to like aim for its chest first. Um I don't know, that's all I got. Um also going back to when I was talking about Skokey the Bear and how he died, um, I started laughing because I was like, I'm about to be such a Debbie Downer. That reminded me of something my mom did. We were all in the car listening to music on our way back um to the airport, like driving through the mountains. And um what's that song everybody loves? Mountain Roads Take Me Home. Uh, that came on, and my mom goes, you know, he died in a plane crash. So that's where I get it from. But yeah, so no, Canada was great. I've been so tired since I got back. I don't know why. I just I literally just all I want to do is sit in the house and watch House of the Dragon and listen to House of the Dragon recaps, and work's been slow, so that's kind of what I've been doing. Um, I told you all this was coming. I'm sick. I love House of the Dragon so much. I watched um the first two episodes of this season, and then I immediately went back and started watching season one, episode one, um, just starting the whole series from the beginning, and it's making it even more devastating. So, I mean, so far I'm loving this season of House of the Dragon. Just a couple notes about the last couple episodes. Um, Ulf remains my king. Um I'm obsessed with him. I identify with him so much. Like, I think it was last season when they did the whole like dragon seed when all these people could try to be a dragon rider. And it was like, it was so funny because they essentially called him on his bluff because he like for years was dining out on this story that he had Targaryen blood, and he's like, Yeah, I could ride a dragon, I could totally ride a dragon if I wanted to, you know, like give me a dragon and I'll ride it. And then they're like, Okay, do you want this dragon? And he was like, Ooh, ooh, I'm I I can't make it. I'm actually busy, and that is so me. That is so me. And then on this last episode, when they were in the woods and he was pooping, relatable, uh, and he got scared by that witch, and he basically was like, You guys take care of yourselves, I'm out of here. I I love him, he's the best. Second only to perhaps spoiler alert, R.I.P. Simon Strong. I loved Simon Strong. I'm so devastated that he's dead. He was just a silly man who loved to eat while people stormed his castle. Um, and it sucks because I am an Eamon apologist. Like, I love Eamon. Um, I love Eamon Targaryen. I love his little marble eyeball. Um, I love his hair, his perfect hair. I love his big ass dragon with that droopy-droopy neck. I didn't like how Eamon kissed his mom. I don't know which was worse, killing Sir Simon or kissing his mom. Um it's gonna be a toss-up for me. But uh Okay. Well, um, I hope you all enjoy this episode. I am sorry again about the sound quality. Uh, what are you gonna do? And I'll see you in a couple weeks. Hey, uh, real quick, I'm back. I was listening to this edit, and I can't believe that I forgot to share this very important fact about bears. Did you know that bears can run faster than race horses? Okay, that's it. Hey, a kid of me here. Just wanted to issue a disclaimer: if you are going hiking in a place with bears, please don't use any of this information I just shared. Please actually check out a reputable source. Um, don't use this as your only resource about bears. I I don't know how reliable I am. Okay, thank you.

unknown 18:49

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 18:50

We're coming to you live from the streets. Never done this before, probably never will again. Um, but I just I'm with my Twilight friends, and this was actually Caitlin's husband Evans idea when we were talking about what we could talk about next, because we just wrapped mustard, and he's like, you guys should go to the magic lounge and do an episode before and then do an episode after. And I was like, that's great, because we've been talking about coming here forever. I guess before we go in there, I just wanted to talk to you all really quickly about how you feel about magic and why we're here tonight. Um I'll go ahead and just start for me. I've never been to a magic show. I'm so excited. Okay, and next guest.

SPEAKER_04 19:30

Yeah, I mean Joanna, I think I've also never, I don't think anyone has been to a magic show in this group, so we're all magic show um newbies. I remember watching Crus Angel on TV as a child, and I'm just really happy to support actual magicians now. That's beautiful.

SPEAKER_03 19:47

Now I feel like I can't now I feel like I can't speak my truth. Um a magician appears to have exited the building and for a smoke break, and um okay, he just went back in. Okay, so I don't like magic. Um so I don't trust people. I don't trust magicians. I think if you get off on deceiving people, it's creepy and weird. And that's my take. Okay, I agree. Um yeah, I know. And I am here because you guys are here, and I just wanted to hang out with you guys, but also I do hear this place is great, and so I'm excited for that component.

SPEAKER_01 20:22

And this is Meredith.

SPEAKER_03 20:23

Oh, yeah, sorry, I didn't introduce myself. This is I'm I'm Meredith, I I was the Beatles one. Oh my god, okay.

SPEAKER_02 20:31

Uh this is Hannah. I did Typhoid Mary. I literally almost forgot what I did. Oh let me hold for background. Um, how dare you insinuate that I've never been to a magic show? Uh there was a place called Bob's Magic Shop in Elmhurst, Illinois, where I grew up. It was seemingly four children. I can't believe it actually was, but I went to like five birthday parties at Bob's Magic Shop, where like when you were like the birthday girl, you got to like go on stage and be part of like the ring act or whatever. Not that I ever was the birthday girl, I wish. Um I was very jealous of my friends who got to do it. But it was very like, they sold like the only way they made money was the little things that they had, like um itch powder or like fake nail in a finger. Like I like that kind of stuff was like very much how they seemed to make money at Bob's magic shop. It's not there anymore, if you can believe it. But that is, I believe, the only magic show I've been to.

SPEAKER_01 21:26

I'm a little surprised because at dinner tonight I mentioned that I hadn't heard of a particular magician duo, and you were shocked. Um how do you know them? And who are they again?

SPEAKER_02 21:36

Penn and teller. Which I am shocked, and I think your audience will be shocked that you have never you act as if I've named the like.

SPEAKER_01 21:43

Well, here's what I'm realizing. I'm like, when I'm thinking about what I love about magic, I think I'm actually thinking the magic that you see in movies like Harry Potter and Laura. So wizard magic. Wizard magic. So I'm actually I have no I so you guys keep saying, like, what do you think is gonna happen? And I'm like, I don't think they'll be able pull it off. Hold on. Just to be clear, you thought we were gonna see spells. I don't know. A little bit, but I did. I got into magic for a minute when I was younger because my dad brought home a couple magic, like those brass knuckles.

SPEAKER_04 22:14

They were like they're like they're like brass rings. Oh like the three rings that they're trying to slight you're like sleight of hand only. Yeah. For the folks in the garage.

SPEAKER_01 22:25

Yeah he wanted me to pickpocket people and then beat them to hell.

SPEAKER_04 22:28

I had an uncle that would give us practical jokes which I think fall in the line of like magic territory because they were like pull my finger, fort pens, uh gum that would shock you if you pulled it out. Those were a bit those were big only it would turn your mouth blue like black, that kind of stuff. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:43

Those are yeah I would consider those evil tricks. Um so is there anything else that you guys want to say about magic before we wrap here uh I just want to backpedal a little bit.

SPEAKER_03 22:53

I do feel like the asshole now for saying I don't trust I'm sure it'll be nice.

SPEAKER_01 22:58

I hope I fall in love with a magician and then you you have to come to grips with whether or not you'll trust him. Oh is there a magician coming?

SPEAKER_02 23:05

No but I wanted to there is not a magician we're all terrified because there could be magicians literally anywhere around this corner listening to us but I want to double down that I love magic and that Meredith is in fact difficult and awful and that's why she said she hates them.

SPEAKER_01 23:21

I didn't know this about you. That's so crazy. I mean were you comfortable at her wedding?

SPEAKER_03 23:25

Yeah were you scared at Caitlin's wedding I did manage to avoid the magician because you know what it is it's like I think it's like opening gifts when like there's a lot of pressure on like how you react and I'm just like I'm I'm too stupid for that like I'm just like uh wow like I feel like I'm like talking to a toddler and I'm like I hope they pull you on stage so bad. I yes here's the thing please don't okay like I don't do it. I will sweat it won't be pretty okay if he's coming for our group I'll do it.

SPEAKER_01 24:00

Okay Caitlin's gonna do it thing Christ okay oh you'll go on stage I thought you were saying we're gonna volunteer Meredith yeah yeah are you ready to be sawed in half yeah I'm ready is that the stuff they'll do here tonight do you think um it's gonna be more it's gonna be that more than expectopatronum I think okay okay okay well we're gonna oh the line's starting now so we're gonna go into the magic lounge thank you all see you later on the other side okay okay so we're out of the magic show and I'll be honest it was very impressive it was very impressive I the first woman I thought she had another string in her hand the whole time yeah yeah I I didn't yeah she was mostly a singer which I will say she opened up with a show singing Anast the song from Anastasia and Meredith within the first note it goes like sting and Meredith goes this is it from Anastasia uh also the uh you guys listen I'm let me just say Chicago Magic Lounge absolutely worth a trip absolutely worth a visit it was so funny influencer it really did blow my mind it did I like didn't really know what to expect and I don't know that it was what I expected but it was like I was like utterly delighted by it. Me too yeah it reminded me of like a stand-up show because I was thinking more like a they're gonna come out with a saw and a a table to split somebody in two and like a fog machine and tigers but this was very much very chill of yeah of of those two those two those two men two who were the two men the white tigers Sigmund and Freud yeah yeah were they magic see that's what I thought they were magic oh were they not magic?

SPEAKER_02 25:46

Sigmund and Freud Sigmund and Freud it can't be Sigmund and Freud wait wait wait Sigmund of what? Freud of what?

SPEAKER_01 25:53

I have horrible news is it Sigmund Freud that's psychology yeah the first lady sang a lot of beautiful songs um the host was always I texted I mean on the verge of singing the whole time and she'd be like it was crazy.

SPEAKER_02 26:17

Do you know like I told Caitlin I was like she is Debbie Reynolds like she believes she is Debbie Reynolds she is Debbie Reynolds like between Debbie Reynolds and like um Liza Minnelli was that our MC for the night at all times she was about to sing.

SPEAKER_03 26:31

Her dream was that the audience goes please ma'am more of you the whole time I was like is she actually supposed to be singing and she's just talking also like the beginning she opened up with like just like a whole history of Chicago magic and I was like I cannot I mean it was it was like beautiful because I'm a history nerd but I was also just like I'm not following well I wasn't either but that was something I would like to look up later is did up close magic originate in Chicago?

SPEAKER_04 26:58

Yeah okay or like um like yeah sleight of hand I think sight of hand yeah or one of them really cool we gotta also say that she one by one told the story of why every group of people were there tonight.

SPEAKER_01 27:13

Just the most magical it truly was it was really cool like that she remembered I didn't have any other notes I I honestly thought it was fantastic.

SPEAKER_03 27:21

That everybody that came up and did table magic before the show that was really that was fun although Joanna couldn't remember her card because she got there was like too much pressure.

SPEAKER_01 27:31

I cannot and I was like it's the ton of spades I've got you I can't I black out under pressure like if somebody asks me a question.

SPEAKER_02 27:38

Um I was gonna say Meredith and Caitlin both responded I feel like to the magic in the same way which was like anger of like how are they doing it? I need to know it. I don't get it and Joanna you act like as if like you've never seen a stage or a human being before like it was like what how at one point she was like she goes she goes no you guys no Joanna's never been in a building with four walls before she was reacting to these magicians honestly so shocked huh do they all so is that a magician thing you have to wear long sleeves?

SPEAKER_04 28:15

I think maybe you have to she like the first straight jacket woman did not that's true. She had a blazer and then she took it off with a straight jacket and then never put it maybe she just put a blazer I think she must have held a lot of things in her hand.

SPEAKER_02 28:28

Okay so from my my pen and teller knowledge of like where they like explain how certain things are done all I could see like for some of it I was like I think there was some stooging which is like it's like you can basically like apparently people kind of do it a lot which is like instant stooging which you basically bring someone on stage and whisper to them like say the number seven or whatever. Like and so and like they're like it works 100% of the time people just they go with the game. So it's basically like sacrificing one person for the like the greater benefit of the room. Now there was no one like pull on stage the number seven but like some of those things I was like like there was one in particular where he was like how many coins are in your invisible coins are in your pocket what are the dice adding up to I was like he told these people like I like I think I think he said when I when I ask say nine when I ask say 27 like or whatever Oh my God see that's what I can't handle. There's it's not possible. It's like he's not actually reading their minds so there's only one solution which is he knew the numbers before we got on stage which is he told them what numbers to say they just seem so sh we all seem so shocked it's hard to which they're real audience members. It's not like they're plants like like he just goes up to an audience member and says I'm gonna call on you when I call on you say the name to say the name I just has nobody spilled the beans I just I just feel like I know um bear with me I know like AI is a bad thing, right?

SPEAKER_03 29:50

But like I'm gonna I have some fucking questions for chat GPT later tonight. I'm gonna be like I need you to fucking explain to me how these card tricks work this is I don't I do not appreciate this trickery like it was shocking.

SPEAKER_04 30:04

The guy the second close up magic guy that came to us and with the cards I felt like when he had us each pick a card he was really forcing one on me. He was like oh was he I really felt like I was like oh this one's easiest for you to grab pick this one.

SPEAKER_03 30:17

Well okay I noticed something in the card game okay so remember he was like Joanna where in the deck did you pull your card from and I was like it was from the middle and you picked like the the right third yeah because I was like so like he he just like this yeah oh closest the closest one to you?

SPEAKER_01 30:37

Okay I because I was like I wanted him to I was like well what angle did you lay these cards out at before I couldn't remember.

SPEAKER_03 30:43

I think that they put you through a lot of tests and you gotta keep up yeah and I didn't you seemed pretty stressed out there from yeah but I was like yeah I wanted to watch like their like flicking of the wrists yeah I know I was like with and my eyes on I was like you son of a bitch what are you doing?

SPEAKER_01 31:03

His first trick none of us responded initially like it was done yeah then we were all quiet and then I think we all were like oh yeah yeah well no because it like happened and I was like wait wait I thought those were one dollar bills and now they're 100 oh that was the trick I see I see my B sorry well done sir yeah yeah it's really scary when this and this is what happened to me at your wedding when they are like pulling they're like is this your card this your card and then they get to you and they go and is this your card and it's not and like the people pleaser in you wants to be like oh my god yeah that is my card but it's part of their bit it's like a bit to be like oh it's not your card what about this one no what about this one and then they finally pull it out from like behind your ear but as a people pleaser it is so hard for me to know that that's a bit I know I I honestly relate to that and that's why I'm like I I will not engage with such nonsense.

SPEAKER_03 31:52

Like the person at the end they're like is that your card?

SPEAKER_02 31:53

And she was like no and I was like oh my god I'd be devastated like I'm just trying to say I'm just like trying to yes and you sir so I'm not a good magic partner I think maybe no me neither oh no I'm happy to expose the magician like yeah I would be like no wrong but this is also as Penn and Teller have also told me is like the thing is like they're always the step that you're on they're five steps past like it's like including like the strait jacket or you know whatever like it's like it's irresponsible for them to like make you be witness to like a trick that they cannot complete. So like you're wherever you're at they're past so like it's I don't know don't worry about their feelings like they're fine like they already they know what's coming like oh so impressive I'd go back yeah I would 100% go back time yeah I had a great time umelli and uh Debbie Reynolds combined yeah it's just like the phrase on the verge of singing I saw you write that note down and I just like I like missed half of what she said because I was laughing.

SPEAKER_01 32:56

It was like the it was like isn't there somebody that is a character that's like guy who's about to break dance it was that but was singing maybe yeah yeah I feel like he does yeah like it was very here we are in Chicago Chicago's known for hit it and then it'd be like and also back in 1930 but thank you all for doing this with me is there anything else you want to add before I let us all go I still don't trust him I think even less now you trust them.

SPEAKER_03 33:27

No I I have yeah I have I have a bone to pick it's like what is the nature of truth in reality I have to get a magician on the show. Yeah I think yeah I think that's crucial.

SPEAKER_02 33:39

Like a sleight of hand that's like that's what like the there's like YouTube videos with like pickpocketers like showing which is very sleight of handy like that fascinates me like the like the pickpocketing of it all like showing how they do it like they like tap the corner of your pocket sorry to touch your boob like touch and then like pull your wallet out.

SPEAKER_01 33:55

I'm like like it's very impressive.

SPEAKER_03 33:56

It's I I think any of these magicians could have robbed me blind to this I'm just like I have such clumsy hands that like when he like shot that card out and like caught it oh yeah I was like I just like the card deck would like explode in my hand I'd be like it took me like 10 minutes to pick it up because I'm just like guys sorry sorry sorry shit I sorry shit shit on New Year's Eve I bought a pen to do magic tricks for people and I never mastered it and nobody ever really appreciated it.

SPEAKER_01 34:24

But I like honestly sat on the couch for the entire New Year's Eve party and it was like a it was like a quick like you're supposed to like split the pen in two and then like in your hand but I it it is the s the slide of hand is so much harder than you think it's gonna be like a pen? Like it was like writing pen? Yes like the yes like it was like watch me stick this pen through a dollar bill. Okay and it looks like you're it looks like you're sticking a pen through a dollar bill. But in reality you like let them write with something with the pen but then you're supposed to while you distract them you flip the pen upside down you take off the false tip or whatever. I know that's too I know and then so then when it's time to like push the pen through the dollar bill there's a magnetic tip that pops off really easily and so you look like you're slamming into the dollar bill but then your hand is supposed to like split the pen and then put the other magnetic tip underneath the bottom of the dollar bill.

SPEAKER_03 35:10

But like do you think magic is easier in our in our era of shortened attention spans because like I'd be like I don't know where to look well I hope so but everybody saw me do it.

SPEAKER_01 35:21

But it's also but then on the it's hard to like look cool and like do that.

SPEAKER_02 35:26

This is also what I want to clarify.

SPEAKER_03 35:28

You were at a New Year's Eve party I had one you threw this party and you were like for my for my literal party trick I am going to practice not not do magic practice magic coming up to you like hey what a great year it's been you've been like I need you to shut the fuck up I said 10 more minutes I'm not ready but yes please in the back I'm like gotta kick this fucking magnet I'll show you all the Amazon I'll show you the link later. Please do and I I'll pay for everyone to have a magic pen.

SPEAKER_01 36:05

It's really hard okay yeah I mean I believe you I have time I could figure it out I honestly I believe you could magic pen yeah I'll show you um okay well thank you all so much for coming on uh appreciate it and we'll do Downton Abbey soon yeah okay thanks for listening to my whole personality this podcast is edited and produced by me Joanna Clark theme music by Rebecca Jaffe if you like this podcast please like subscribe rate it review it wherever you listen to podcasts thanks for listening bye bye