My Whole Personality
My Whole Personality is a comedy podcast hosted by comedian Joanna Clark. Every other week, Joanna invites her friends to come on and talk about the obsessions and fascinations that have made them insufferable to talk to at parties. With deep dives into everything from Magic Eye art to turn-of-the-century salad dressings, My Whole Personality is a podcast dedicated to anyone who's lost hours of their life on Reddit. Follow My Whole Personality Pod on Instagram at @mywholepersonalitypod. Produced and edited by Joanna Clark.
Music by Rebecca Jaffe.
Podcast art by Michelle Hong (michelleyhong.com).
My Whole Personality
House of the Dragon and Drop Dead Gorgeous
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Joanna comes out as an Aemond apologist and secures exclusive rights to Drew's tombstone. Drew explains why Drop Dead Gorgeous is the funniest movie ever made and reveals critical information about pink eye.
Follow the show on Instagram @mywholepersonalitypod
Produced and edited by Joanna Clark
Theme music by Rebecca Jaffe
Podcast art by Michelle Hong (michelleyhong.com)
I like Aegon's like frizzle frazzled little burnt hairs. Yeah. Like he's not just bald. He's like he's like got like a comb over from hell.
SPEAKER_03You can see where the blast of the dragon hit him. And like, you know, this was eclipsed. Shave your head back. I know. Shave your head.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. I think he just wants to hold on to that Targaryen hair, though.
SPEAKER_03Well, I mean, you know, it's a hard decision for men to shave their heads.
SPEAKER_04Don't I know it?
SPEAKER_00I like this one thing. So I made it my whole thing. Now no one wants to talk to me at parties. Please listen to my spiel, because I made it my whole deal. I made it my whole personality. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Hey everyone, welcome back to my whole personality. I'm gonna keep this intro quick because this is a longer episode. Um but I wanted to make sure people knew up top. We are talking about House of the Dragon in this episode, but I we are not spoiling anything. Um we talk about every episode that has aired to date. We might even be one behind in this episode. So no spoilers unless you haven't seen a single episode of House of the Dragon. And then and then things will be spoiled. I also want to say we do we all we do spoil how big pigs and cows are. So if you don't want to know how big a cow is, if you don't want to know how big a pig is, we talk about it in this episode. I actually had to cut some of it because we talked for a really long time about how much they weigh compared to horses. And I people are probably you're probably gonna think that I'm making this up that I didn't really realize how big a pig or a cow was, because I'm from Kentucky and I should know because I've like, I'm sure seen them. But I I I realized recently that I've never really had a firm grasp on how big cows are until I saw a TikTok about one. So I don't know, that's that. But enjoy this episode and I'll see you all in a couple weeks. This is a big moment for us on the podcast. This is huge because tonight we have our first three-time solo guest. You know him, you love him. Drew!
SPEAKER_05Yeah, no, I'm here.
SPEAKER_03Drew's here. It's a work night, so thank you for coming over after work.
SPEAKER_05I there's nothing else I'd rather do on a Tuesday, honestly. Thank you. Because I wanted to be the first one to three solo episodes.
SPEAKER_03I think that Who is it?
SPEAKER_05Meredith coming from a gig?
SPEAKER_03Caitlin.
SPEAKER_05Caitlin or Meredith. I don't know.
SPEAKER_03Meredith, well I like them both.
SPEAKER_05They're great. Good content, ladies.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, things. Really nice.
SPEAKER_05I didn't get invited to the magic show though.
SPEAKER_03I would like to go back. I had a really good time. Like it was honestly, it it it blew my mind.
SPEAKER_05I've been, and I did enjoy it.
SPEAKER_03So you've been?
SPEAKER_05Yeah, you know, I got chosen to come on stage.
SPEAKER_03Okay, I have a question for you. Did you hear what Hannah was talking about?
SPEAKER_05How she said that they set you up to like no. Oh, no, I was kind of expecting that they would, but it was he did something with my phone. It was like a trick on my phone that he like made it say a number on my calculator. It was weird.
SPEAKER_02Did you said boobies?
SPEAKER_05No. I don't remember how he I don't remember what it was or how he did it, but it was I had to like show my phone. He didn't even touch it. And it like, I don't know, he did something. I didn't know how he did it.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05I think it was magic.
SPEAKER_03Okay, well, we're gonna talk about a couple things today. The first one we're gonna talk about, which has taken me a really long time to get to, just because it is so important to me. And I just feel like kind of like Meredith Marks, the text is so deep and so big that I worry I I don't even like, I don't even feel comfortable. I still don't feel comfortable talking about it because it is so important to me, and I'm afraid I'm gonna fuck it up.
SPEAKER_05All right, yeah, but you don't have to be worried. Okay, people will accept you. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03If you actually no whatever you bring to the table, how dare you? You texted me and you texted me already once and said, I don't trust you anymore. You have a bad take on Amond.
SPEAKER_05Oh. Yeah. Well, yeah, because what did you say about Amond?
SPEAKER_03I love him.
SPEAKER_05Well, that's bad. Okay, you are an Amon topologist, and I don't appreciate that.
SPEAKER_03Okay. Um, but we're gonna talk about House of the Dragon.
SPEAKER_05Okay, love it.
SPEAKER_03Because uh it's been a really long this is it's been a really long time since I've been so disgustingly obsessed with something. Like it, this and then Downton Abbey in therapy, I was like, do I have a problem? But yeah, House of the Dragon, I am obsessed with it. I think about it all the time. I remember when the last or maybe like when the first season finished, I was like, I have to wait until 2025 or whatever. Like the gaps between the seasons are so big that I I like can't handle it.
SPEAKER_05Well, and what do we know why it takes so long? No, because probably, but I don't like did it because like they have to know that they're doing or okay, wait. Is this the last season or are they doing a four? So they already knew going in, most likely, that they were gonna do four. And they said, let's wait to see how this goes before we even start season two. Like, I don't understand why it took so long.
SPEAKER_03I don't either. I don't either. What so what do you like about the show?
SPEAKER_05Well, I have always been Targaryans are my favorite. They always have been, which is not probably a hot take, which is probably why this was chosen to be the spin-off or whatever. But I feel like the fabled like Dance of the Dragons was referenced so many times in Game of Thrones that I feel like this was just a really good choice for them to do a spin-off of. Yeah. Because it's the most interesting timeline, like the it's the most interesting family line in terms of what was referenced in Game of Thrones. So I just like that it has I love anything with like history. I like a family tree.
SPEAKER_03I like yes, I love a period piece, even though this isn't a period that ever existed, but like I love it. To me, it is historical fiction, and I'm watching it as such.
SPEAKER_05Isn't it insane? Like the geography aspect too. Like it'll be like Wesos, Estheros, and Westeros, Esos and Westeros, right? But it's like those are two continents and they have a map, and we act like it's real.
SPEAKER_03And they have a language, they have multiple languages.
SPEAKER_05Because didn't Valerian and um what was Dothraki? Oh, yeah, they made that one fully like those are actual languages, right? Now that they made that. And then how do you learn to speak them? But then again, you could be speaking it real bad and nobody would know.
SPEAKER_03I know. I think it I would imagine they just like learn it phonetically and it's like, well, you know what? I don't know. Did you speak pig Latin at all in middle school?
SPEAKER_05I don't think that's real. Is pig Latin real?
SPEAKER_02You could do you you could do dink it. Wait.
SPEAKER_05Wait, I don't think you're doing that, right? Isn't it like you take the first letter for the end and add an A? Isn't that what it is? Isn't that all it is? Um You just had a seizure.
SPEAKER_03Wait, Heather, what's Pig Latin?
SPEAKER_05Heather, pig Latin. Speak it. Are you making that up?
SPEAKER_03No.
SPEAKER_05But I thought that all pig Latin was is that you took the first letter and put it at the end with an A. Is that what you're doing?
SPEAKER_03Pig becomes Igpay. Oh, so what was I speaking?
SPEAKER_05I don't think you were.
SPEAKER_03Apple becomes Apple way? No way. Three becomes E thray.
SPEAKER_05Because isn't it you take am I wrong?
SPEAKER_03No, you're right. I'm looking at the well, it's AI overview.
SPEAKER_05But I think it's like you take the first letter of the word and put it at the end and then put an A.
SPEAKER_03It is. Somebody said, how do I say they love you in Pig Latin? If somebody told me they loved me, if that's how they told me they loved me in Pig Latin.
SPEAKER_05Why is it called pig Latin?
SPEAKER_03I don't know. I We Ole U Ye.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, that's all it is.
SPEAKER_03What language was I speaking?
SPEAKER_05I don't know, but can you do it again? What do you think you're saying?
SPEAKER_03My name is Joanna. Do you guys not hear it?
SPEAKER_05No, I could tell Well, no. No, I didn't know what you were saying, but I could tell that you knew what you were saying.
unknownDid I hear it?
SPEAKER_05I'm I I get a guy I get a guy, get a goo, get a guy. That's what it sounds like you're saying. Really?
SPEAKER_03Well, maybe okay. Well, maybe it's maybe it could be a good spy language.
SPEAKER_05So you're saying that Valerian is pig Latin?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05So when they speak Valerian, yeah. I get entranced.
SPEAKER_02I do too.
SPEAKER_05But I also get kind of mad because I don't want to have to read. And you know what they do sometimes? They'll put the subtitles in the candles.
SPEAKER_03I know. I was really struggling with that. I was like, what what are you doing here? Okay, so you like it that it's historically accurate.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, based on fiction. Yeah. Um, I also love um Darcy. Emma Darcy.
SPEAKER_03Emma Darcy. I love Emma Darcy.
SPEAKER_05I love Emma Darcy.
SPEAKER_03But I know I was because I loved like season one with the younger actresses, the younger actors. I was like, oh, I'm so attached to them. I'm gonna be so upset when they switch these out for new actors. Oh my god, I love them so much.
SPEAKER_05I thought that too, though, because young Reneira, what's her Millie Adcock? She's but she was Supergirl now.
SPEAKER_03Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_05Um, but she was so good.
SPEAKER_03So good.
SPEAKER_05But I also didn't really believe her growing up to be Emma Darcy, though.
SPEAKER_03Well, I didn't either, and then I saw a picture that was say they had a picture of a young Emma Darcy, and then they cast Millie like based on that picture, which like okay, and then sometimes when I see Rhaenera in certain lights, I'm like, oh, I see the young, I see Millie, whatever. But um I it is weird for me and hard to get behind that it's like Kristen Cole and all of them stayed the same age, right? And hardware and strong, like they were all the same age.
SPEAKER_05Well, and um Damon.
SPEAKER_03Yes, Damol.
SPEAKER_05Okay, so how do you feel? How would you feel if your father married your best friend?
SPEAKER_03Now I'm glad that you asked because I'd be so pissed. Oh, oh, oh you would you be okay with it?
SPEAKER_05No, I just thought maybe you'd be.
SPEAKER_03Um I know, and so like unfortunately, Viserys is one of my favorite characters.
SPEAKER_05Why? Not that I don't necessarily dislike him. I just wouldn't, I wouldn't even think of him.
SPEAKER_03He I miss his I miss the acting. Like I loved watching him play the character. It I loved every episode tuning in and being like, what part of his body's gonna be missing?
SPEAKER_05Sure, yeah.
SPEAKER_03I love how he decayed in front of us, and then he had that fan about the opera mask.
SPEAKER_05He did, mature life.
SPEAKER_03And then I I actually I had this in my notes to mention to you, my one of my favorite moments of the show is him when he kicks open that th throne room door and he looks like blind pew from Muff at Treasure Island.
SPEAKER_05It's the exact same they took that shot for shot, yes, side by side those, and you'd have the same thing.
SPEAKER_03He should have married, because I was re-watching season one. It made so much more sense, even though she was like 10 years old.
SPEAKER_05Sure.
SPEAKER_03It would have made so much more sense to marry Lena, who is Damon's daughter, Damon's wife, Damon's wife, you're right.
SPEAKER_05Okay, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Like it would have made so like strategically, politically, it would have been so much better.
SPEAKER_05But then so before she was married to Damon?
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_05I can't remember the timeline of that.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, okay. They like pitched her as an option, uh, and he said, nah, I'm gonna go for Allison. And he was like, I would rather maybe the 10-year-old. And it could have been age, you know.
SPEAKER_05Could have been that. Um but well that does lead me to my biggest qualm though.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05Why do we need three Amons, four Aegons, Elena, Arena, and Abela, and Jaharis and Jahara. Jahara and Jaharis. And then all of a sudden you'll have like John Alan.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. If they had named people differently, we wouldn't be in this mess. I think what I love about the show the most is like the historical fiction aspect or whatever, but also it is so fun to watch, like it does such a good job of all these different personalities throwing them in a room and then just like seeing how they interact with each other because it's it's so combustible. Like it's wild.
SPEAKER_05I think that's what makes it not more compelling, but I think that's why it isn't necessarily like a a lesser than Game of Thrones, because it has character dynamic that is so much more entwined and interesting and layered because they all have such history.
SPEAKER_03And they're working with such a small group, like they're all family. They're going to all these different locations. We're like following these people, right?
SPEAKER_05Because it really essentially is only about the Targaryens and the High Towers. I mean, like there's other people, but they're barely in it. Um, because like I think there was one episode in season two that I think a lot of people well, I don't know, I didn't hear this, but I feel like some people might think it was like a one of the boring episodes, but I thought it was the most fascinating. It was like when they were all in the castle at the same time and they literally would did nothing but like walk between rooms and talk to each other, and it was like different conversations between different people the whole time. I feel like it was a funeral or something.
SPEAKER_03Oh okay.
SPEAKER_05And it was like, I loved that episode. I thought it was crazy because like it did so much for the development of their relationships. Yeah. There wasn't any action like at all.
SPEAKER_03So then do you like this current season? Because I feel like they've done a lot of those, like it's like West Wing.
SPEAKER_05Well, it's been a good balance because there's been two or three, there's been five so far, right? I think as of this recording. But there, I think the two of the episodes have been like really action-heavy and like big plot point like shifts. And then the other three were like slower and like more conversational.
SPEAKER_03And like I like them because I like the whole time this show has been going on, it's all about like I want to be queen, I want to be king, I want to like rule these people. But then I'm just thinking, like, do they even know how to rule? Or like, what does the rule actually look like? And so it's really fun to see her get what she's always wanted and become queen and then being like, we don't have this.
SPEAKER_05Sucks immediately. We don't have anything.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_05It's I thought that was a really cool episode. Like her first day ruling and it being like, Oh, everything's a mess.
SPEAKER_03Everything's such a mess. That the bed, like she was you know, just like sleep in the bed that like it's gotta be so gross.
SPEAKER_05Like her dad, with respect, like rotted in the well, and Aegon also like rotted in the Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Um he this is a line that is really familiar to me because it they say it a lot on a podcast I listen to. Do you remember? You know how he was burned? He said that he was burned and his his cock excuse me, his cock split like a sausage on a spit.
SPEAKER_05Who said that? Aegon. They said that in the show. He said that of his own.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_05Cock.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_05Wow.
SPEAKER_03Okay, so something's not.
SPEAKER_05No, I didn't I don't like to think about that. So he does so he doesn't have one anymore, or does he have two?
SPEAKER_03He doesn't or does he have kind of like a bird's banana peel?
SPEAKER_05Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_03Um, I don't think he has one. I don't know.
SPEAKER_05Who is Helena's baby daddy?
SPEAKER_03A gone.
SPEAKER_05In in the past, but how? Hasn't he been gone for like a while?
SPEAKER_03So that's what's so confusing is like I don't think that we spend so much time like in between episodes and in between years. The time is much more condensed than we think. Like, I think she got pregnant before he went into battle.
SPEAKER_05Before he ever got burned? Yeah. Before his cook split like a sausage on his own. Sure. Okay. That makes sense. Well, I don't know, but okay. Sorry. No, that's great. No, I love thinking about that. But so, okay, that makes sense.
SPEAKER_03I think it's his.
SPEAKER_05Okay, I just thought there was more time between things.
SPEAKER_03I did too. Because I was also kind of like, how the fuck is Sunfire like they're like she's not rotted.
SPEAKER_05I know.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I know. And it's like, okay, well, if she is alive, like she hasn't been eating, drinking, you know.
SPEAKER_05I'm so sexist because I literally am shocked every time that a dragon is a girl.
SPEAKER_03Oh, Sunfire might actually be a boy.
SPEAKER_05I think Well, Vagar's a girl, I know. Which is weird to me.
SPEAKER_03Um, Sunfire.
SPEAKER_05She's just so ugly. I just want girls to be pretty. You know what I mean? Like Moondancer is probably it's probably a boy, but I want to be a girl.
SPEAKER_03Are you gonna find it? Yeah. Okay, Sunfire is a male dragon, my mistake. Okay.
SPEAKER_05What do you think of uh Sheep Stealer's overbite?
SPEAKER_03I'm up so I was gonna ask you your favorite dragon.
unknownOh.
SPEAKER_03Sheepstealer for me, right? I'm not there.
SPEAKER_04Number one, though?
SPEAKER_03Two.
SPEAKER_04Who's number one?
SPEAKER_03Vagar. Oh, really? Yes.
SPEAKER_04Wait, why do you like Vagar so much?
SPEAKER_03Do you remember when Joan was on steroids and she got really big and then she had a lot lose a lot of weight and she had some skin that hung in places?
SPEAKER_05Yeah, her Vagar era. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03That's she had Vagar neck.
SPEAKER_05Did she have holes in her wings?
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03Um, well, I've been giving her some B12 injections, so she might. But so when I see Vagar with that droopy neck, and Vagar is like old as shit, has so many, just I feel like she's just kind of like, you know what? I don't really care anymore. I don't really care about any of this anymore.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. No, and Vagar is like, I like I don't care. I'll eat things, I'll eat other dragons and other people. Yeah, like he just doesn't give a shit. Yeah, she's which I respect. Oh, see, I keep doing it. Okay.
SPEAKER_03Um also she's really big. Yeah. Yeah, huge.
SPEAKER_05No, okay, you know what I'm obsessed with? Those charts. Have you seen the visuals? Like, and it shows you like who knows if they're even close to like the current they're not real. So I guess it doesn't matter. I'm like really I'm like, who knows if that's right. But like, yeah, the scale of Vagar versus like C-Rax or something, it's like crazy.
SPEAKER_03I know. It's like really hard to get your head around. Um who is your favorite?
SPEAKER_05I think Caraxes is my favorite.
SPEAKER_03You like that long neck?
SPEAKER_05I love that long snake.
SPEAKER_03That neck.
SPEAKER_05And then it has like a deviated septum or something, so it like makes weird noises.
SPEAKER_03It does. It does a lot of like um, it sounds like a whale underwater.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, I like that one.
SPEAKER_03Which we've talked about on this podcast before. Check out the Fear of the Ocean episode.
SPEAKER_05Um link below.
SPEAKER_03That's that that's the story I told where my sister and I would listen to like whale sounds lying hanging on a boom box and then she threw up in my ear.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, I know. I remember that. Yeah, I'll never think about it again.
SPEAKER_03Um, I like caraxes a lot. That it was really hard for me. It's hard for me to pick favorites in general, but yeah, I was like, I do like caraxes. But then I I'm kind of obsessed with especially all the memes about Sheep Stealer.
SPEAKER_06How it's like I forgot, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Or it's like, I love the idea that he's one of those just like old, ugly, crusty, dusty dogs that you see that's just like they're gonna bite your ankles. Yes, you know.
SPEAKER_05Well, and poor Raina. You don't feel bad for Raina?
SPEAKER_03I don't feel bad for Raina.
SPEAKER_05Wait, wa really, I feel like she's the victim here.
SPEAKER_03I think she should have never ridden that she just met this dragon.
SPEAKER_05She should have never taken him to battle, that's for damn sure. Yeah, that was a dumb thing to do.
SPEAKER_03I mean, but I guess like maybe in her defense, she might not have had that much of a choice. Like maybe he was gonna go in anyway, but I just feel like it was reckless.
SPEAKER_05You think he was gonna go in without her?
SPEAKER_03No, like when she was like flying and then they saw the battle, you know.
SPEAKER_05Oh, so you think they just happened about it? I think I guess I guess how would she know?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I think that they did. Um, I don't know. I also like sh I mean I'm a rule follower. She was supposed to be babysitting.
SPEAKER_05She was supposed to be babysitting.
SPEAKER_03Anything else about the dragons?
SPEAKER_05Well, you know what? I always think about how do you think they just get really big over time? Like, is Vagar just the biggest because it's the oldest? Yes. Because all because as they the chart goes down, they're like teeny teeny tiny. And I'm like, do they just never stop growing?
SPEAKER_03That's an interesting question. That's like ears.
SPEAKER_05Because I always thought, like, oh, you just got lucky, you have a big one. But it's like, oh, is yours just like the oldest one?
SPEAKER_03I think it's the oldest, but I'm sure that some are also probably just like by nature smaller. But I think it's probably age.
SPEAKER_05Oh, okay. Well, but no, I love them. I think they're a very interesting addition to the cast.
SPEAKER_03I yeah, because they're like giving us more time with them, which means of course we're gonna watch all of them die horrifically.
SPEAKER_05I mean, don't we know that going up?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, but like when Karaxes was drinking water like a cat.
SPEAKER_05I don't want him to die specifically. Can Caraxes just Bagar gonna die?
SPEAKER_03Something to know about me is Do you already know?
SPEAKER_05Yes, you already know all the spoilers. Yes. Oh, don't tell me anything. I know, I know.
SPEAKER_03Even as I'm watching, and if I see a character and I go, I forgot how they die, I Google immediately, how does XYZ die?
SPEAKER_05Really? Has is it always like really true to the stories?
SPEAKER_03Well, okay, so what's really interesting to the books, and I haven't read the books, I've just listened to a lot of podcasts about the books.
SPEAKER_05Sure.
SPEAKER_03Okay. But the book, so it's like we know it's like written as an account. It's like X happened, Y happened, this happened, like um.
SPEAKER_05Oh, it's not written from like anybody's perspective?
SPEAKER_03It it's written by like unreliable narrators. So it's like these people being like, and then I saw I saw, you know, Rhaenyra do this, but you don't really, you just these people are I mean, they are do horrible things, but like these two women are painted out to be like horrible, horrible people who are just like evil doing stupid, dumb women stuff.
SPEAKER_04Who Renew?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, and Alice. Oh, these evil queens, but then everybody in it is kind of but now you realize like it's so much more nuanced than that, and it's really fun seeing that like how history said like Rhaenyra, whatever somebody started a war, and then it's like, well, actually, Alice and misheard that, you know? So it's like really fun.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03That and then what was the other question that you were oh okay. So how they're different from the book in the books, Rhaenier that it's uh alleged and more serious that Rhaenira and Damon actually do kill her first husband, Lenor.
SPEAKER_05Remember how they were like he like escaped to be gay.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, we were like, we're gonna go let you be you, put you on a canoe and get out. Here, but we're gonna pretend like you died, and we're gonna make everybody believe that you died because we want them to know that we're like ruthless and to be so in the book they actually did kill them? That's what the book says. Oh but again, it's like because it's written by unreliable narrators, so this is like oh, okay.
SPEAKER_05That's interesting. So it's like potentially this is like the real Yeah.
SPEAKER_03This is like the real story. Oh, I think. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Have you seen Odysseus? Or Odyssey, yeah. Oh, yeah, it's good.
SPEAKER_03Okay. Okay, I trust your opinion. I know you don't trust mine anymore.
SPEAKER_05What no, uh, because you say that um that one Jurassic Park movie is one of the best movies you've ever seen.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah, because I really like that Jurassic Park movie. Um, okay. Oh sorry, I feel like we spent way too much time on this. I want to keep going. Um most compelling character to watch, like your favorite character to watch.
SPEAKER_05Um, you know who I really did love? Um, Mayle's.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Wait, the dragon or Rainice?
SPEAKER_05Rain East. Yeah. Whatever they did. Did they name that Dragon after her?
SPEAKER_03I don't know. It's so funny because I liked her a lot too.
SPEAKER_05I really liked her. She was my favorite last season for sure. And then I think my favorite character when they pop up on screen, and I'm happy to see them right now is Damon. I really like Damon.
SPEAKER_03I do too. I think he's so much fun to watch. Like he's obviously a terrible person, but the way that Matt Smith plays him and the way that he's just he's funny.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, no, he's very funny.
SPEAKER_03A cunt!
SPEAKER_05Oh god. And and I I think I think Veneera is the best actor, but she her care her as a character, I don't really know. I kind of get annoyed by her. I feel like she's like she makes good decisions and then she makes bad decisions. It's like I don't always agree with her, you know?
SPEAKER_03I yes, same. I know. She guess is good, but But you do and you do always agree with Damon.
SPEAKER_05Not necessarily, but I feel like I understand his motives. I feel like his motives are genuinely like for her best interest.
SPEAKER_03Now they are, yeah, I think so. Yeah. I like him a lot. I'm also very attracted to him, which is why I'm also very attracted to Amy.
SPEAKER_05Well, he was a doctor, who?
SPEAKER_03Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, Amon, or I was like, Damon was a doctor. No, Doctor Who, Matt Smith. When he was like out with a crab feeder, everything was aesthetic.
SPEAKER_05Who's your favorite character? Um is it Damon?
SPEAKER_03Damon, it's I had a hard time, but Damon is up there.
SPEAKER_05Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_03May he rest. I knew you Sir Simon.
SPEAKER_05He had like three lines.
SPEAKER_03I know. Like I watched like a best of like a great a good compilation of him today, and I was like, God, I miss him.
SPEAKER_05He's like in the background servant face.
SPEAKER_03But then so then my um my set my second or like most true favorite character is Laris.
SPEAKER_05Okay, I have a big issue with that. Why?
SPEAKER_03I think he's so fun to watch because to me, this is how people win traders.
SPEAKER_05Sure. Well, you're right.
SPEAKER_03I don't think I can ever win because it's like every day I'm like, how are they gonna get out of this one? And it's like he is constantly just being like, what can I do to make sure I don't die in this moment, even though the thing that I've just said to get out of this will probably have me killed.
SPEAKER_05He's very manipulative and very smart. Smart. Yeah. I love it. He's a good character, at least.
SPEAKER_03And then obviously I love him and I'm I'm attracted to him. Um, the first scene that we get with him when we first see him all grown up, when he turns around and goes, nephews.
SPEAKER_05So hot. Oh, you're crazy.
SPEAKER_03I know.
SPEAKER_05I was so glad when he got that eye gouged out.
SPEAKER_03Well, I didn't like him at that age. He was a yeah.
SPEAKER_05He's better now? Yeah. Is that what you're arguing?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I like him with one eye. I actually think it's one of the things that I like about him.
SPEAKER_05Okay. Yeah. No, I mean, I'm listening I'm not gonna yuck your yum here, honey. Thank you.
SPEAKER_03Favorite wig, Zah.
SPEAKER_05I think my favorite wig, which I'm assuming is a wig, but maybe it wasn't. When they dyed that one boy's hair blonde just so he could fake that he was the prince. I was like, that's some iconic hair trickery.
SPEAKER_03It was.
SPEAKER_05And oh, and then that scene when uh Allison saw him. Yes, and you could tell just from the eyes, they were like I I love the news of that. She I what I love about her specifically this season is she's constantly just being like, Yeah, she is, I feel like she's constantly getting like bamboozled.
SPEAKER_03I know. I I it's fun to watch because she's con she's making plans and then she's getting so fucked over by them. Like when she's like, Yeah, let me get this plan B for my daughter. Oh, I'm it's for of course I'll drink it right now.
SPEAKER_05She said, Well, of course. I know my first thought was is that gonna make her I mean that'll make you sick regardless of if you're pregnant or not.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, poop.
SPEAKER_05Oh, poop.
SPEAKER_03Is that is that what yeah, and yeah, I don't know. But I was like, that would happen to me if I was trying to poison someone. If I was trying to poison someone, and they were like, You'd be like, Oh no, my screen's fine, and they'd be like, There's literally no other way out of this.
SPEAKER_05I know, but like that was that I think that wig was a good one because the it was a major plot point. The hair was.
SPEAKER_02That's okay.
SPEAKER_05But I I like um I like Aegon's like frizzle frazzled little burnt hairs. Yeah. Like he's not just bald, he's like he's like got like a comb over from hell.
SPEAKER_03You can see where the blast of the dragon hit him, and like, you know, this was eclipsed. Shave your head, babe. I know. Shave your head.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. I think he just wants to hold on to that Targaryen hair, though.
SPEAKER_03Well, I mean, you know, it's a hard decision for men to shave their heads.
SPEAKER_04Don't I know it?
SPEAKER_03Um what's your favorite? My favorite wig is your girl Rainice, that bump it.
SPEAKER_05So good.
SPEAKER_03Because no one else has anything close to it. No, such a strange choice.
SPEAKER_05It is weird. It it is the only one, you're right.
SPEAKER_03How'd he put a helmet on it?
SPEAKER_05She managed.
SPEAKER_03And then she well she died. But I don't think a helmet would have saved her.
SPEAKER_05I do love Rainice.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. It's so it's it's very fierce. And um, I used to wear my hair like that in college.
SPEAKER_05Oh, you should put up a pick.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I had to bump it. I remember I was at a basement party and I was like backing up and I bonked it on the stairs and I was like, Oh no.
SPEAKER_05No, because it was not my real head, but it was well, I just thought maybe the plastic dug into your scalp at that point. No, no. Oh, okay, that's good. Um the I would also like to point out the wig on Raina when he finds her in that cave. What her hair is all she looks like Rick and Morty. You know, Morty. Yes.
SPEAKER_03I don't know if like Sheep Stealer, did she have him burn off her hair?
SPEAKER_05She might have. I don't know. I don't know why her hair was frizzle frazzled. It didn't make sense.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. She's I she had beautiful hair. Yeah, she'd seen some things in that cave. I love them together.
SPEAKER_05Sheepstealer and Raina? Yeah.
SPEAKER_03I love how we throw her little foods.
SPEAKER_05Yes. He's sweet.
SPEAKER_03She he's her bad dog that she adopted, and no one will like pet sit for her. But so she's like, well, fuck all of you guys. It's I'm taking my dog into every restaurant then.
SPEAKER_05But I will say, I think the best wig just in terms of artistry is Rhaenyra's. Yeah. The bird. Because that um is like a wig wig. Because Emma has short hair. Like their hair is like pixie cut or whatever. And so she always has Rhaenyra, always has very long I know, beautiful braids.
SPEAKER_03It looks, and they look really good. And then sorry, I forgot to say that um Harrow and Strong, his introduction, I was like devastated when he died. He was the I've like my I've never seen anybody so hot. And he was like skinning a rabbit when we met him.
SPEAKER_05What why when how did he die? I don't remember.
SPEAKER_03Laris, unfortunately, uh set him on fire in his own home.
SPEAKER_05Sure, sure, sure. Yeah. No, he was very hot.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Oh, damn.
SPEAKER_03I know.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, see, and you love Laris.
SPEAKER_03I do. I'm complicated. So your topic is something that you brought up to me many times. Um couldn't believe if I hadn't seen it. Needed me to see it. Corinne I think has also brought it up a couple of times. Love it. Um why did it even come up recently to talk about?
SPEAKER_05I I don't know what you're referencing, but this comes up for me like once a week.
SPEAKER_03Okay. It's Drop Dead Gorgeous.
SPEAKER_05I talk about it all the time. Yeah, Drop Dead Gorgeous is one of the best movies I've ever seen. It's it's comic genius. And for those who don't know, it is a, I believe it's a 1999 mockumentary film. Um, it has the most incredible cast ever assembled. We're talking Kirsten Dunst, Denise Richards, Kirsty Alley, Ellen Barkin, um, Brittany Murphy, Amy Adams.
SPEAKER_03Her first role.
SPEAKER_05Her first role. Um, oh, and um Allison Janney.
SPEAKER_03Yes, yeah.
SPEAKER_05I'm probably missing people too. Like it's in it's the it's the funny. Who's Frau? Frau. Um that's really disrespectful to her because we should know, but I don't I don't know. Okay, I don't know her name. But so essentially the premise. For those who don't know, you should go watch it immediately. But um, it is a mockumentary centered around Mount Rose, Minnesota's teen princess pageant. And it follows a group of young girls, young ladies, um, who are competing to win the title of Mount Rose Teen Princess. And um, you know, it's a very dark comedy. Yeah. Because slowly but surely the girls start dying in various tragic ways.
SPEAKER_03I wasn't ready, and this is like I was like, oh, I love this movie. This is my humor. Immediately they kill someone where she's like getting into the truck and she's like, I'm gonna enter the pageant, blows up.
SPEAKER_05She said, Nobody can stop me but me. And then and then her thrasher blows up.
SPEAKER_03Amazing.
SPEAKER_05It's the best.
SPEAKER_03That's like a real housewives moment.
SPEAKER_05No, it and so I made so Joe had never seen it. So I made her, we watched it last night, we pushed play together, we pushed pause together multiple times because Joe had ads.
SPEAKER_03Well, because I well, I actually took a note about this. So I I just typed in search, you know, where to watch it, and I just clicked whatever popped up. Turns out it was Tubi, uh-huh, which I downloaded to watch um Goosebumps and Animorphs.
SPEAKER_04As one does.
SPEAKER_03Um, so I was watching it and I was like, this is amazing. And then I was like, oh, there's an ad. Drew, oh great, it's only 10 seconds. I thought I'm only having like 10 second ads. That's amazing. Then I get a 15-second ad, then I get a 30-second ad. The last ad that we had to watch was like, it felt like five minutes and it was about a bear in a cage. And it was like, don't put bears in cages.
SPEAKER_05I was sitting there waiting. I was like, this one seems long. I thought maybe you took a bathroom break or something.
SPEAKER_03And the whole time, like this, because it was just of a bear, like an abused bear in a cage.
SPEAKER_05Oh. And the I think What was that an ad for?
SPEAKER_03Don't put bears in cages.
SPEAKER_05That's the name of the company.
SPEAKER_03The company was what's what are they at?
SPEAKER_05Are they are they pro bears? They're unboxed. Because they want them free to kill? They want them to be bears.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_05They want to be bears in jars. Okay.
SPEAKER_03In jars.
SPEAKER_05Well, that's a weird ad. Yeah. But okay. So that's what we were contending with.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. But we really synced up quite well, and it was fun because I would like something would surprise me and I'd be like, oh my, I forget what was the first, like, oh my god, oh my god. Well, when that when that light or that speaker fell on top of that girl's head, and I oh, oh, oh, and you just like knew immediately where I was. Yeah. That was fun.
SPEAKER_05No, I think you also did oh oh when um the when the former winner was doing her St. Paul pork products ad.
SPEAKER_03Yes. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Oh, I just love St. Paul pork products.
SPEAKER_03Yep. I also love that they immediately gave her a love interest and then she had to do his makeup on his dead body.
SPEAKER_05Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_03That was really fun.
SPEAKER_05Like, I feel like the complete disregard for human life that it's exhibited throughout the film is so funny because you love there's probably yes, there's probably like six deaths or like four or five, and then like and then a couple like major injuries. I mean, and like they're barely impacting anyone. Like they barely even acknowledge that they happened.
SPEAKER_03They blow by it so fast.
SPEAKER_05Like when um Brett Brett gets shot in the head and and she said, She said, Well, hunting's dangerous.
SPEAKER_03The pacing was I like didn't know where I was like on unsteady ground for the pacing because it felt like it was two-thirds the high school beauty pageant, and I thought that's the end of the movie, and then it was like one third, one third. Like, so I I felt like a little vertigo. I was like, where what when will this end? But not in a bad way. Yeah, like what are they taking me? Where are they taking me?
SPEAKER_05I've always liked that about it because you would think that the pinnacle scene would be the end of the pageant.
SPEAKER_01I didn't think she was gonna die like that.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. In the belly of a swan. Yeah. I like when so, okay, wait, hold on. I feel like we need to do some character explanations here. So there are eight, I believe, eight total contestants in this pageant. Yeah. There is Kirsten Dunce, who's Amber Atkins. Mother is the hairstylist. She works out of her trailer. Loves to smoke cigarettes. She's called trailer trash many, many times, which is a big part of her identity, and we love this. And so, and then there's Rebecca Ann Lehman, who is uh Denise Richards. So good to see her. And she's the richest family in a small town. Front page news, one of them takes a shit, right? Then we have other, but the other supporting actors are um Brittany Murphy, who has the best laugh.
SPEAKER_03She was so good in this. It it didn't feel like she was acting.
SPEAKER_05She wasn't acting.
SPEAKER_03I think she just showed up on set and was like, Can I can I have fun?
SPEAKER_05Yeah, they were like, You don't even have a script, just go talk.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05She was just like laughing for like I think half of her lines are just hysteric laughter.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, it makes me sad.
SPEAKER_05And then Amy Adams in her first role ever, and she's Leslie, and she um is a very horny cheerleader who's secretly pregnant.
SPEAKER_03I love that she was a cheerleader for the wrestling team.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, roll them over, lay them flat, bend their shoulders, do them back. Yeah. And then um there's the girl that you really like that's like a Shakespearean, she's an actor, a very serious actor. And then there's the uh dog girl who does dog impressions for her talent portion of the program.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. And there would have been the woman who's exploded.
SPEAKER_05And then there was oh yeah, Tammy Curry. She's the first victim. She she blows up on her tractor. The heavy vibration helped her think, but she only smoked after a good ride. And then um, there was Molly Howard, who is an adopted. She's a red-headed woman that was adopted by a Japanese family. And so she considers herself an Asian American. And I love her, I love it so much. But they're like really into country music. It's very funny. So silly. And then um, what was am I listening?
SPEAKER_03One um that gets hit on the head with the speaker.
SPEAKER_05Oh, yeah, and then the girl, the blow to her head made her deaf. Yes, yeah. Yeah. Um, there's I don't remember her name, but she is obsessed with sign language, and she is the victim of a speaker falling on her head or a light. It was a light falling on her head, and she she goes deaf, which was really a dream come true for her.
SPEAKER_03A dream come true for her. Yeah, she had to leave the pageant early because her kid her sister had a baby or somebody and it was a deaf baby.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, spoiler alert.
SPEAKER_03Um, did you know that I was really into sign language?
SPEAKER_05She didn't have to leave the pageant early. She was in the hospital. Oh, wait, that's when she was leaving. She switched on the page. She had to switch numbers. You're right, you're right, you're right. Um, but what were you saying? You were in a pageant?
SPEAKER_03No, I was really into sign language.
SPEAKER_05But did did you were you fluent?
SPEAKER_03No. Well, I guess Is that what it's called? It's all the alphabet.
SPEAKER_05What's it called? Is fluency? Is that the correct word though? Okay. Anyway, you can do the alphabet and sign language?
SPEAKER_03Um, I can do my name.
SPEAKER_05Can you still do it? Yeah. Show the camera. Show it. Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_03You get that?
SPEAKER_05Was that Pig Latin?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Um, but yeah, I was really into I went to acting camp and um sign language was one of our classes, and I was really into sign language.
SPEAKER_05Well, that's really cool. I've always thought it was interesting, and I wish that it would have been a more like accessible um class when we were younger.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I agree.
SPEAKER_05Because I think that is a really interesting thing to know how to do. Yeah, so that's the those are the contestants in Mount Rose's Teen Princess Pageant.
SPEAKER_03I I liked the way that the hospital really functioned as a dorm.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, no, it's like literally half the town lives there in any given moment. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, like because then eventually we go see her mother in the hospital after there was a fire at the trailer, and she flew through the yard like a through through the air like a goddamn lawn dart.
SPEAKER_03Wait, that was one of my favorite lines. Um, I wrote it down, I'm sure you'll say it. Um I sat down in Kablooy. I was ass up in someone's flower bed.
SPEAKER_05She said, I clung to your tap shoes.
SPEAKER_03Like what?
SPEAKER_05She's she said, I clung to your tap shoes um while I was flying through the air like a con damn lawnar. And then she said, Go talk to the guy that cut them off. He'll give them to you.
SPEAKER_03So good. Of the contestants, yes. Who do you think you are and who do you think I am?
SPEAKER_05Okay. I think that I am probably saying on three. You want me to say who I am? We're gonna say together who I am on three.
SPEAKER_03Can we say the actor's name?
SPEAKER_05Um, yeah, we'll say the actor. One, two, three. Kristen Downs. You think I'm Denise Richards?
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_05You think I'm Rebecca Ann Lehman?
SPEAKER_03Have you ever played a game with yourself?
SPEAKER_05Give me that stringy ass hair.
SPEAKER_03A hundred percent. I think that you're can you not? We watched it and I said, Heather, I know. I said, I have a question for Drew. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05So you think this is a lack of self-awareness?
SPEAKER_03No, I think it's like a you like to compete, and I can absolutely see you getting up there crushing, but then being like, I'll kill somebody.
SPEAKER_05Oh, well, sure. Okay, fine.
SPEAKER_03I'll explode a tractor if it's in my way.
SPEAKER_05Um alien. Well, touche. Is that okay? But I will say that her mother was the killer.
SPEAKER_02Oh.
SPEAKER_05So, you know, okay. I guess I'll accept it. I'm not actually gonna kill anyone, I'll just threaten them.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah. Just like a menacing.
SPEAKER_05I do like the way she says um certain lines. Like, like she said when she's getting in a fight with Amber, she says, like my mother says it's Sunday dinner, come and get it.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03I just I see her in yell. Yeah, and I can see your favorite tree has a good Christian trunk.
SPEAKER_05And long leafy branches to shade handicapped kids on a hot summer day. Yes, it's yeah, I like that. I'll accept it. I'm fine with that. No, do you want to start? Do we are do we gonna say who you are? Of the contestants?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05But you have one that you want me to say, and that's not what I'm saying.
SPEAKER_03No, I don't know what you're gonna say, actually. Okay, we'll say another kind of three. One, two, two, three. That's a Shakespeare girl. Okay. So nobody cool.
SPEAKER_05I knew you were gonna say the Shakespeare girl.
SPEAKER_03You did.
SPEAKER_05And in reality, I do think that's correct. I just wanted to call you Tess.
SPEAKER_03Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_05Because Tess is crazy. She said they remade my belly from Skim with Skim for my butt.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, that's true. I see myself in her.
SPEAKER_05My favorite thing about Tess. This is if you all haven't seen this, go watch it so you understand and then re-watch this. We're really pulling out crazy things here. But when the the dog is running up to her and it's going and then it's a dachshund like this big.
SPEAKER_03Oh, they're pointing that out.
SPEAKER_05I love it. So oh, sorry, Fitz. But no, I just love everything about her. She's so silly. When she talks about her lucky bolt hitting her in the head.
SPEAKER_03Yes, yeah. Yeah, you're right. And honestly, the only scene that I know of that other girl, do we only see her that once when she's doing it?
SPEAKER_05She's not in it that often. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03So like I don't care about her. I just soil and green.
SPEAKER_05She does soil and green, her monologue.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Um, what would your talent be?
SPEAKER_05I've thought about this a lot. And I feel like I'm not, I don't know if I have a talent.
SPEAKER_02Me neither.
SPEAKER_05Well, and like I really did think about this because I was thinking about all the options. And it's like, I would have to pull out something. I would be like Gracie Lou Freebush in Miscongeniality and do like glass it, like you know what I mean? Like I would have to pull out something that's not a talent. That's something that you yeah, because I'm not like I can't tap dance or like opera sing, you know? Like I and I can't like roller blade.
SPEAKER_03I think you could absolutely dance if they had a chair.
SPEAKER_05Oh, you think pole dancing.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Wait, that's the answer.
SPEAKER_03I would pole dance. Yeah, the kind of dancing that you do for us. I would want to pole dance.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_05No, that would be fun. Yeah, okay. No, the my my talent is.
SPEAKER_03Okay, yeah. I think it's an obvious.
SPEAKER_05What's yours?
SPEAKER_03I think I'd play the drums.
SPEAKER_05Like animal?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I think I've said it before. I think if you put a drum set in front of me, I could play it like Led Zet one.
SPEAKER_05But you have
SPEAKER_03I don't know how to play the piano though.
SPEAKER_05But so why don't you get a drum set?
SPEAKER_03Well, I don't think Yeah. I don't know if it's like a welcome. I just think that if you were to put sticks in my hands, I could play any song. And so I think that would be my talent.
SPEAKER_05Okay. So would you practice before, or would you just see a drum set for the first time and that would be yourself? I would walk on stage and it would be like you're my talent is the first time playing drum.
SPEAKER_03Yes. And you'll be like, oh, she's pretty good for the first time.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. No, that's good. I like that answer.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, thank you.
SPEAKER_05It's very good. Now, spoiler alert.
SPEAKER_03I wouldn't have eaten a seafood.
SPEAKER_05Uh me neither.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_05And you know what I genuinely do say every time I'm around Shellfish? My mom always told me never to eat anything that carry its house on its back. You never know when the last time it was cleaned.
SPEAKER_03Oh my god, I missed that line. It's so true.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. But um wait, what I was gonna say is if it wasn't if it wasn't Becky or Amber, who do you think should have won the pageant?
SPEAKER_04Well, wait.
SPEAKER_03Probably probably I'm trying to think of who else was even in it. You know what I mean? I think Amy Adams.
SPEAKER_05Amy Adams is the cart answer. Um she also had some of the best interview answers. My favorite of the interview is they're asking all of them like softball questions, and they're like, What's your what if you could have if you were a tree, what would you be? Or like blah blah blah. And then they get to Amber, who they're trying to sack it against. Oh they want her to fail. And they said, name and spell all the states in alphabetical order. And she goes, seriously? And then she said Alabama, A L A B A M E. And then at the end, she's like, Oh, West Virginia. It's so good. It was good, it's so good. I love it. Um we were literally texting so much about this last night.
SPEAKER_03Um we were counting the number of times they said the R word.
SPEAKER_05They did say the R word six times. So just know that going in. It's it's a it's a 90s movie.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, a lot of things aged terribly, but also perfectly.
SPEAKER_05It's pretty good.
SPEAKER_03Not that, yeah.
SPEAKER_05I mean, if you think about how many times the black-eyed peas said the R word and let's get the R word, and then you think about how many times Drop Dead Gorgeous said it like a decade before that. That's of course they were pretty it's pretty acceptable in comparison.
SPEAKER_03I I could do an episode on how I didn't know that that song was that song.
SPEAKER_05Well, and then you listen to it over and over and over again, which was really inappropriate, Joe.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Take it to getting hands on. Oh my god, yeah.
SPEAKER_05Let's get it started.
SPEAKER_03Oh my god, my heart.
SPEAKER_05Did you think I was gonna say yes? Um We were feverishly texting every time they said it.
SPEAKER_03What do you what do you think makes this movie different slash like why did this shape your personality?
SPEAKER_05So I don't think I had a sense of humor before this movie.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_05I genuinely think this movie like taught me everything that I needed to know about what like dry humor is.
SPEAKER_02Okay, because you had puppets.
SPEAKER_05Yes, no, and I think I I just think it's like really on brand for me. This, like everything about this is like dark, semi-inappropriate, but like lighthearted, like there's nothing actually bad about it. It's just like toe in the line of like, is this okay to say? I'm not so sure. Because there's like, well, but it isn't. But I think I've always been an advocate for this. Like it and I don't care. I don't think it's bad. I really don't think it's bad. It's not saying something to be like controversial or like saying something derogatory. It's like, isn't this insane that this person just said that? You know what I mean? Like it's like very very tropic thunder. Yeah. Like, like, how did Robert Downey Jr. get away with that? Because it was done from the intent of like, this is obviously insane.
SPEAKER_03Right.
SPEAKER_05I feel like that movie taught me how to like take it to a point without being too far in a way.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_05But like I feel like this movie just really toes a line between smart, offensive, and like knowing how to play that game. Because some things like South Park, for example, which I do love, is offensive. It will say terrible, awful things that are genuinely like inexcusable, but like people excuse them because it's it's South Park. Yeah. But like this is like, I don't know, it's just a different, it's a different like brand of humor that I immediately was so drawn to. Every single line of this movie is so funny, and zero lines in this movie come off like a joke.
SPEAKER_03You're right.
SPEAKER_05Nothing, nothing is said with the intent of it being like a punchline or anything like that. It's like everything is deadpan.
SPEAKER_03And it's in that perfect accent.
SPEAKER_05It's so good. It's just so funny.
SPEAKER_03It is. I can see that this shaped your humor 100%.
SPEAKER_05I love it.
SPEAKER_03What are your favorite lines?
SPEAKER_05Almost anything that Loretta says, who is Alice and Janney, who is one of the best actresses ever, when they're in the hospital and um she takes Amber out, and the the little Candy Sharper nurse comes up and she says, Hey, Mrs. Sadpants and your friend serious Sally, would an ice cold mint help that sprown turn upside down? And she looks at her and she says, Would an ice cold mint help if I shoved your head up your ass? I like that. Um, I also really, really like when Britney Murphy is coming out. This is her last line in the movie. She's coming out of the pageant. She had given her costume to Amber so that she could compete because Amber's tap costume was stolen. And her dad says, you know, your brother Peter would have never done that. And she said, You know what, Dad? You know what? Peter's gay.
SPEAKER_02Gay! It's so good.
SPEAKER_05So good. The one thing that I probably say the most, well, one is really small because there's when the swan blows up and Becky and Lehman dies, um, there's a camera shot of the people like in the inferno, and there's somebody going, Oh crap, oh god, oh crap.
SPEAKER_03Oh crap.
SPEAKER_05I love that.
SPEAKER_03I wrote that down, that was nice.
SPEAKER_05No, that's a very good one. Um, so I do say oh crap a lot. Um what uh what else do I say a lot? There's so many.
SPEAKER_03I had a question. They mentioned cow tipping. Why was that such a big thing? And is that where you just tip a cow over while it's sleeping?
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_03That's awful.
SPEAKER_05It's a terrible thing to do. Um I don't know why that was such a big thing because when you when you were growing up, people talked about that, right? I never did it.
SPEAKER_03I never yeah, I never did it either.
SPEAKER_05Um, I'm assuming people actually did do it, or was that like an urban legend type thing?
SPEAKER_03It's so weird.
SPEAKER_05But is that even true that it would just fall over?
SPEAKER_03I don't know. I don't want to find out. Also, cows are Heather told me this. Cows are so big.
SPEAKER_05But you didn't know cows were big until Heather told you. Well, you didn't know cows were big?
SPEAKER_03How big they were. And well, you know, because I saw this TikTok video of a cow that goes inside somebody's house and like makes baked goods with him. I was like, it's crazy how big the cow goes in the house and bakes? Yes, I'll send you videos.
SPEAKER_05It's a cartoon? No. What do you mean?
SPEAKER_03The cow is just like assisting with the baking and he's getting his mouth and everything. It's a real nightmare, hygienically.
SPEAKER_05So he's not actually helping.
SPEAKER_03He's in the cows. He's making it worse. Yeah, he's making it worse. But he's so big in the house, and I was like, I can't believe he's a horse. He's a horse. And then Heather was like, No, cows are big.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, cows are I I'm confused. How big did you think a cow was? Yeah, how big did you think? If you had to guess how many feet tall a cow was.
SPEAKER_03I thought a cow was like a great dane.
SPEAKER_05No, you don't.
SPEAKER_03How big do you think a pig is? I think a pig is like a golden retriever. How big is a pig?
SPEAKER_05Well, I mean, they all vary. Like, there are smaller pigs, but like a big from Vagar to to dreamfire. Yeah, I mean, pigs can be really, really big.
SPEAKER_03Well, they kill you in the wild.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. Yeah. Like, I would say not a car, but like Oh my god. No, not a car. Not a car.
SPEAKER_03Well, now when you said car.
SPEAKER_05I would say, I would say if you took a Volkswagen beetle and divided it in half, you might have a big pig. Is that a weird? Is that pretty close?
SPEAKER_03So like a motorcycle?
SPEAKER_05Yeah. But but shorter. Pigs are way wider and as long, but not as tall, I wouldn't think.
SPEAKER_03Oh my god.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. And then cows. I mean cows are tall. Cows are really tall. Um cows would be taller than a Subaru, yes. Shorter than a pickup truck. I don't know. I'm confused that you don't know how big a cow is.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I don't know how big a cow is.
SPEAKER_01Full-grown breeding hogs can reach 500 to 650 cows.
SPEAKER_03I've always said that. So I used to walk this basset hound.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_03That like when you get a low center of gravity like that and a long body, there's nothing you can do to control it.
SPEAKER_05Oh, okay. I was like, about what?
SPEAKER_03Why were we talking about it? You're a cow tipping. So you could never tip a cow. Okay.
SPEAKER_05I would never tip a cow.
SPEAKER_03Um, some of the lines that I liked. Um, a solid Christian trunk I brought up. I sat down in Kablooy. I was assed up in someone's flower bed. Um beautiful as a whore's ass today. That was really nice.
SPEAKER_05Lester Lehman.
SPEAKER_03And then she didn't deserve to die in the belly of a swan like that. Uh wait. Has anybody put this on their tombstone?
SPEAKER_05I'm about to.
SPEAKER_03I swear to God, Drew. Can you Allie has been giving us plans for her funeral? She's like, because she's like, I I know what I want, I know what I don't want. I need to put this down in writing. Can can we today put that down in writing?
SPEAKER_05Yes.
SPEAKER_03He didn't deserve to die in the belly of a swan like that.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. And then I want like a burnt tiara on the top of my yeah.
SPEAKER_03Okay, done.
SPEAKER_05Perfect.
SPEAKER_03Um, I'll be your power of attorney.
unknownPerfect.
SPEAKER_05This is official. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Do you remember the first time you watched it?
SPEAKER_05This was one of those movies that we had direct TV when I was little.
SPEAKER_03And waterbeds?
SPEAKER_05Yeah. We were. Oh my god. Very rich.
SPEAKER_03Keeping up with the website.
SPEAKER_05Well, yeah. And um it was like, you do you remember when you were little though? And like it didn't really necessarily need to be direct TV. It was just like you would put on like TBS or something, and like there would be like certain movies that played all the time. For some reason, on direct TV, this one specific channel always had Drop Dead Gorgeous on. And I feel like me and my sister like stumbled upon it one summer. I don't, I don't think she cared for it that much, but I am immediately enamored and I watched it probably like 40 times that summer. I mean, it was like one of the first things I was so excited to show Justin. Really? Yes.
SPEAKER_03What was his piece of culture that he showed you?
SPEAKER_05He really likes this. Um random. There, I don't know. He's probably gonna think it's weird that this is what I thought of too. But there's this um Ronald McDonald like illustrated like musical movie called Oh my god, Justin. No, he loved it when he was little. He watched it all the time, and it was called, it was called like um, it was like Halloween themed. It was like spooky something, like Ronald McDonald, like Halloween. And it was just like a 20-minute cartoon, but he watched it all the time, and we watched it, and it was really cute. He still sings the song like all the time.
SPEAKER_03Aww.
SPEAKER_05And he was really excited to show it to me, and honestly, he was great.
SPEAKER_03That's really sweet.
SPEAKER_05I wish I could think of what it was called, but I'll have him come on and do that as his topic.
SPEAKER_03And I will again do like bubbles of toenails or something stupid.
SPEAKER_05Please do send them bodily. I just want you to do something this absolutely disgusting for him every time.
SPEAKER_03Pink eye. No, because it needs to be like something about my body, and I don't have well, I don't have pink eye right now.
SPEAKER_05I get pink eye all the time. And it's not even from the gay stuff. It's from it's from, I think, you okay. Well, you know what I really think it's from? This is gross, I think.
SPEAKER_03Do you touch your eyes a lot?
SPEAKER_05No, I think what happens is I have really powerful sneezes. Like really powerful. And so sometimes, like, even with I'm like it backfired. I think it backfires. Because even if I do it into a tissue, like if I don't like shield correctly, like if it's or if it's like quick and I'm like trying to like I feel like I'll like backfire. Like really, it's like ricochets. Anyway, so I feel like that's the culprit of why I get pink eye like semi-often.
SPEAKER_03That's so gross.
SPEAKER_05I know, I hate it.
SPEAKER_03Well, that's how I feel about flossing with an open wound on your face. No, that makes sense. It's the pink eye of the face.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. Whoa.
SPEAKER_03That's that is crazy. I now that I'm thinking about it, I feel like you do have a is it you that I know Heather has, excuse me, Heather has a loud sneeze.
SPEAKER_05Oh, do you love critique and heather? Loud sneezes.
SPEAKER_03Do you sneeze like an old man or do you blow your nose like an old man? I forget.
unknownBlow my nose.
SPEAKER_03Okay, yeah, she honks her nose like an old man. So then is Drew. Oh no. Is Drew the one who has a really loud sneeze then?
SPEAKER_05Mine is really powerful. It's not like, ah, Drew! It's not like that. It's like it's very powerful. It's just a lot of air.
SPEAKER_03One of our yells.
SPEAKER_05No, I that's not me. Okay. It's probably Evan. Probably Evan. Probably Evan.
SPEAKER_03Did you notice that I redacted his name on this week's episode?
SPEAKER_05He bleeped it out. Keep it in this time, though.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Okay.
SPEAKER_03Thanks so much for coming on. You know what? Let me end on a little something cooler.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_03I'm so glad you're here.
SPEAKER_04Oh, but is that it?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Thanks for listening to My Whole Personality. This podcast is edited and produced by me, Joanna Clark. Theme music by Rebecca Jaffe. If you like this podcast, please like, subscribe, rate it, review it, wherever you listen to podcasts. Thanks for listening. Bye bye.